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turn them together; a man may be too confident; I would have nothing lye on my head; I cannot be thus satisfy’d.
Page. Look, where my ranting host of the garter comes; there is either liquor in his pate, or money in his purse, when he looks so merrily. How now, mine hoft
SC E N E VI.
Enter Host and Shallow. Hoft. How now, bully Rock? thou’rt a gentleman; cavalierojustice, I say.
Shal. I follow, mine host, I follow. Good even, and twenty, good master Page. Master Page, will you go with us ? we have sport in hand.
Hoft. Tell him, cavaliero-justice; tell him, bully Rock.
Shal. Sir, there is a fray to be fought between fir Hugh the Welch priest, and Caius the French doctor.
Ford. Good mine host o’th garter, a word with you.
Shal. Will you go with us to behold it? my merry hoft hath had the measuring of their weapons, and, I think, hath appointed them contrary places; for, believe me, I hear the parson is no jester. Hark, I will tell you what our sport shall be.
Hoft. Hast thou no suit against my knight, my guest-cavalier?
Ford. None, I protest; but I'll give you a pottle of burnt fack to give me recourse to him, and tell him my name is Brook; only for a jest.
Hof. My hand, bully; thou shalt have egress and regress; faid I well? and thy name shall be Brook. It is a merry knight. Will you go, myn-heers ?
Shal. Have with you, mine hoft.
Shal. Tut, sir, I could have told you more; in these times you stand on distance, your passes, stoccado's, and I know not what: 'tis the heart, master Page; 'tis here, 'tis here. I have seen
the time, with my long sword, I would have made you four tall
Hoft. Here, boys, here, here: Shall we wag?
[Exeunt Hoft, Shallow, and Page. Ford. Though Page be a secure fool, and stand so firmly on his wife's fealty, yet I cannot put off my opinion so easily. She was in his company at Page's house, and what made them there, I know not. Well, I will look further into't; and I have a difguise to found Falstaff : if I find her honest, I lose not my labour; if she be otherwise, 'tis labour well bestow’d. [Exit.
Enter Falstaff and Pistol.
Pift. Why, then the world's mine oyster, which I with Tword will open.
Fal. Not a penny. I have been content, sir, you should lay my countenance to pawn; I have grated upon my good friends for three reprieves for you, and your couch-fellow Nym; or else you had look'd through the grate, like a geminy of baboons. I am damn’d in hell for swearing to gentlemen my friends, you were good soldiers, and tall fellows. And when mistress Bridget lost the handle of her fan, I took’t upon mine honour, thou hadst it
Pift. Didst thou not share? hadst thou not fifteen pence?
Fal. Reason, you rogue, reason: think'st thou I'll endanger my foul gratis? At a word, hang no more about me, I am no gibbet for you: go, a short knife, and a thong, to your manor of Pickt-batch', go; you'll not bear a letter for me, you rogue ! you stand upon your honour ! why, thou unconfinable baseness, it is
* A noted harbour for thieves and pick-pockets.
as much as I can do to keep the term of my honour precise. I
Enter mistress Quickly.
Fal. Two thousand, fair woman, and I'll vouchsafe thee the hearing.
Quic. There is one mistress Ford, fir: I pray, come a little nearer this ways: I myself dwell with master doctor Caius.
Fal. Well, on: mistress Ford, you say.
Fal. I warrant thee, no body hears : mine own people, mine own people.
Quic. Are they so? heav'n bless them, and make them his fervants !
Fal. Well: mistress Ford, what of her?
ship's a wanton ; well, heav'n forgive you, and all of us, I pray!
Fal. Mistress Ford, come, mistress Ford
Quic. Marry, this is the short and the long of it; you have brought her into such a canaries as ’tis wonderful: the best courtier of them all, when the court lay at Windsor, could never have brought her to such a canary. Yet there has been knights, and lords, and gentlemen, with their coaches; I warrant you, coach after coach, letter after letter, gift after gift, smelling so sweetly; all musk, and so ruffling, I warrant you, in filk and gold, and in such alligant terms, and such wine and sugar of the best, and the fairest, that would have won any woman's heart; and, I warrant you, they could never get an eye-wink of her. I had myself twenty angels given me this morning; but I defy all angels, in any such fort, as they say, but in the way of honesty; and, I warrant you, they could never get her so much as sip on a cup with the proudest of them all; and yet there has been earls, nay, which is more, pensioners; but, I warrant you, all is one with her.
Fal. But what says she to me? be brief, my good she-Mercury.
Quic. Marry, she hath receiv'd your letter, for the which she thanks you a thousand times; and the gives you to notify that her husband will be absence from his house between ten and eleven.
Tal. Ten and eleven.
Quic. Ay, forsooth; and then you may come and see the picture, she says, that you wot of: master Ford, her husband, will be from home. Alas! the sweet woman leads an ill life with him, he's a very jealousy-man; she leads a very frampold life with him, good heart.
Fal. Ten and eleven: woman, commend me to her; I will not fail her. Quic. Why, you
say well : but I have another messenger to your worship; mistress Page has her hearty commendations to you too; and let me tell you in your ear, she's as fartuous a civil modest wife, and one (I tell you) that will not miss you morning and evening prayer, as any is in Windsor, whoe’er be the other; and The bad me tell your worship, that her husband is seldom from home; but she hopes there will come a time. I never knew a
woman so dote upon a man; surely, I think, you have charms, la; yes, in truth
Fal. Not I, I assure thee; setting the attraction of my good parts afide, I have no other charms.
Quic. Blessing on your heart fort! Fal. But, I pray thee, tell me this; has Ford's wife and Page's wife acquainted each other how they love me?
Qụic. That were a jest, indeed! they have not fo little grace, I hope; that were a trick, indeed! but mistress Page would desire you to send her
of all loves: her husband has a marvellous infection to the little page; and, truly, master Page is an honest man. Never a wife in Windfor leads a better life than she does; do what she will, say what she will, take all, pay all, go to bed when she list, rise when she list, all is as she will; and, truly, she deserves it; for if there be a kind woman in Windsor, truly, she is one. You must fend her your page; no remedy.
Fal. Why, I will.
you, he may come and
s my purse, I am yet thy debtor. Boy, go along with this woman. This news distracts me.
[Ex. Quic. and Robin.
Fal. Say'st thou fo, old Jack ? go thy ways; I'll make more of thy old body than I have done; will they yet look after thee? Wilt thou, after the expence of so much money, be now a gainer? good body, I thank thee; let them say, 'tis grofly done, so it be fairly done, no matter.