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and fine ladies (beauties of their times) that are good for nothing but to hide the bare walls of a garret. In short, Sir, unless you can prevail with her to forego the wonderful advantages of making such exquisite purchases, as (she says) all the world would jump at, I shall very soon be quite a beggar: for if she goes on at this rate buying things for nothing, as she calls it, I shall shortly have nothing to buy withal.
As these valuable purchases are daily multiplying upon my hands, and as my house is become a repository for the refuse of sales and auctions, the only method I can think of at present to get rid of them, is to make an auction myself. For this purpose I have drawn out a catalogue; and have sent you the following specimen, that by it you may judge of the rest of my curiosities.
OF THE CHOICE AND VALUABLE
EFFECTS OF MR. ****
LEAVING OFF HOUSEKEEPING
TO BE SOLD BY AUCTION.
In the First Day's Sale (among other Particulars equally curious) will be included,
A WHOLE-SHEET print of King Charles on horseback, by Mr. Henry Overton, finely coloured. Mary Queen of Scots, by the same master, done after the life, and painted upon glass; the right eye cracked, and the nose a little scratched.
A capital picture of Adam and Eve, in cross-stitch.
Noah's Ark, in tent-stitch, its companion. Fair Rosamond's Bower, in Nun's work, by the same hand.
A lively representation of Chevy Chase, in lignum vitæ, rose-wood, and mother of pearl, curiously inlaid. Several lesser pieces of birds, beasts, fruits, and flowers, copied from nature in coloured silks, stained feathers and painted straw.
Merlin's Cave, in shell-work; composed of above a thousand beautiful shells, with a cascade of looking-glass playing in the middle.
A most curious Tea-table of rare old Japan; with the edges broke off, and one of the legs wanting. A most rare and inestimable collection of right old China; consisting of half a punch bowl, three parts of a dish, half a dozen plates joined together with wires drilled through their middles, a sugar-dish with a piece broke off the side, a tea-pot without a spout, another without an handle, and five odd cups and saucers, the cracks neatly joined with white paint.
Some large and elegant Jars and Vases in papier machée.
Several figures of dogs, monkeys, cats, parrots, Mandarins, and Bramins, of the Chelsea and Bow manufactory.
TO WHICH WILL BE ADDED,
A SMALL, BUT WELL-CHOSEN COLLECTION OF
POPE's Works, and all our best authors, published in ink-stands, tea-chests, and quandrille-boxes for fishes and counters.
Miss in her Teens. The Fool in Fashion. All for Love. The way to Win Him. She would if She Could. Much a-do about Nothing, bound together for the use of the fair sex, in a complete set of dressing-boxes.
A new Form of Self-Examination, in a snuff-box with a looking-glass in the lid of it.
The Spiritual Comfort, or Companion for the Closet, in a small pocket volume containing a bottle of Cordial Water.
The Posthumous Works of the late Lord Viscount Bolingbroke, in a close-stool.
I am, Sir,
You humble Servant, &c.
No. XCII. THURSDAY, OCTOBER 30.
O nata mecum Consule Manlio,
Seu rixam, et insanos amores,
Brisk wine some hearts inspires with gladness,
DRINKING is one of those popular vices, which most people reckon among their venial failings; and it is thought no great blot on a man's character, to say he takes his glass rather too freely. But as those vices
are most dangerous, and likely to prevail, which, if not approved, are at least commonly excused, I have been tempted to examine, whether drinking really deserves that quarter it receives from the generality of mankind and I must own, that after a strict attention to the principal motives, that induce men to become hard drinkers, as well as to the consequences, which such excesses produce, I am at a loss to account for the received maxim, that "in good wine there is truth;" and should no more expect happiness in a full bowl, than chastity in the bar of a ta
The incentives to this practice are some of them very shocking, and some very ridiculous: as will perhaps appear from the following characters.
Poor Heartly was blest with every noble qualification of the head and heart, and bade fair for the love and admiration of the whole world; but was unfortunately bound in a very large sum for a friend, who disappeared, and left him to the mercy of the law. The distresses, thus brought upon him by the treachery of another, threw him into the deepest despair; and he had at last recourse to drinking, to benumb (if possible) the very sense of reflection. He is miserable, when sober; and when drunk, stupified and muddled: his misfortunes have robbed him of all his joys of life and he is now endeavouring wilfully to put an end to them by a slow poison.
Tom Buck, from the first day that he was put into breeches, was always accounted a boy of spirit; and before he reached the top of Westminster school, knew the names and faces of the most noted girls upon town, tossed off his claret with a smack, and had a long tick at the tavern. When he went to Oxford, he espoused the Tory party, because they drank deepest; and he has for some years been accounted a fourbottle man. He drank for fame; and has so well es
tablished his character, that he was never known to send a man from his chambers sober, but generally laid his whole company under the table. Since his leaving the university, nobody ever acquired more reputation by electioneering; for he can see out the stoutest freeholder in England. He has, indeed, swatlowed many a tun in the service of his country; and is now a sounder patriot by two bottles, than any man in the county.
Poor Wou'd-be became a debauchee through mere bashfulness, and a foolish sort of modesty, and has made many a man drunk in spite of his teeth. He contracted an acquaintance with a set of hard-drinkers: and though he would as soon chuse to swallow a dose of physic, has not courage to refuse a bumper. He is drunk every night, and always sick to death the next morning, when he constantly resolves to drink nothing stronger than small beer for the future; but at night the poor fellow gets drunk again through downright modesty. Thus Wou'd-be suffers himself to be pressed into the service; and since he has commenced a jolly fellow, is become one of the most miserable wretches upon earth.
Honest Ned Brimmer is at present the most dismal object, that ever fell a sacrifice to liquor. It was unluckily his first ambition to promote what is called good fellowship. In this undertaking he has in a very few years entirely ruined his constitution; and now stalks up and down in so piteous a condition, as might inspire his companions with more melancholy reflections than an empty bottle. He has quite lost all appetite; and he is now obliged to keep up a weak artificial heat in his body, by the same means that destroyed the natural warmth of his constitution. Rum, brandy, and usquebaugh are his diet drinks: and he may perhaps linger a few months, before he falls a martyr to good fellowship.