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By Jove-I'd rather turn Lascar at once :
[Goes behind Meadows and empties his pockets This is indeed a prize!
(Meadows turns suddenly round.
Your pardon, sir;
(Exit. Meadows (still musing). This is indeed a great Metropolis.
Enter BLIND VOCALIST. Blind Vocalist (singing). Hey, the bonny! (Knocks up against MEADOWS, who exit). Hol the bonny- A passenger knocks up against the Blind VOCAList on the other side). Hey, the bonny-(A butcher's tray strikes the Blind VOCAList in the chest)-breast knot. As he continues singing " Hey, the bonny! ho, the bonny," the Blind VOCALIST encounters rarious collisions, and his breath being taken away by a poke or a push between each bar, he is carried away by the stream of passenger 8.
Enter Brown and JONES. Meeting, they stop and shake hands
most cordially for several minutes. Brown How are you, JONES ? Jones.
Why, Brown, I do declare 'Tis quite an age since you and I have met.
Brown. I'm quite delighted.
I'm extremely glad.
[An awkward pause. Brown. Welll and how are you?
Thank you, very well;
Quite well, I thank you.
[Another awkward pause. Jones. Oh!-by the way–have you seen Thomson lately? Brown. Not very lately. (After a pause, and as if struck
with a happy idea). But I met with SMITH
A week ago.
Oh! did you though, indeed ?
Why, he seemed pretty well.
they were going to speak to each other.
You were going to speak ?
Oh! and so was I. Good-day.
Smith turns round. Jones turning round at the same time
they both return and look at each other.
[Exeunt finally; and the conversation and the curtain drop together.
(A slight Variation on LONGFELLOW's " EXCELSIOR.")
The shades of night were falling fast,
His hat, a wide-awake; beneath
In calm first-floors he saw the light
“Come early home," his Uncle said,
“Stay,” said his Aunt, come home to sup,
“Mind how you meddle with that lamp !
At break of day, as far West-ward
And by the bailiff's faithful hounil,
Thence, on a dull and muggy day,
JONES AT THE BARBER'S SHOP.
SCENE.—A Barber's Shop. Barber's men engaged in cutting hair,
making wigs, and other barberesque operations.
Enter Jones, meeting Oily the barber. Jones. I wish my hair cut.
Oily. Pray, sir, take a seat. (OILY puts a chair for JONES, who sits. During the following dialogue 011.y con tinues cutting JONES's hair.
Oily. We've had much wet, sir.
Oily. I hoped fair weather might have lasted us
Jones. At one time—so did I.
(A pause of some minutes.
Jones. Nol in town!
Oily. Amazement --but I now remember well.
Jones (looking at him). No—'t was yourself.
(A long pause, interrupted only by the clipping of the scissors,
Oily. But, sir, the hair when dry Turns quickly gray.
Jones. That color I prefer.
Oily. But hair, when gray, will rapidly fall off, And baldness will ensue.
Jones. I would be bald.
Oily. Perhaps you mean to say you'd like a wig:-
Jones. Deception I detest. [Another pause ensues, during which Oily blows down Jones's neck, and relieves
him from the linen wrapper in which he has been enveloped during the process of hair-cutting.
Oily. We've brushes, soaps, and scent, of every kind.
Jones. No: nothing. Yet—there may be something, too, That you may show me.
Oily. Name it, sir. Jones. The door.
[Exi! JONES. Oily (to his man). That's a rum customer at any rate. Had I cut him as short as he cut me, How little hair upon his head would be! But if kind friends will all our pains requite, We'll hope for better luck another night.
(Shop-bell rings and curtain falls.
THE SATED ONE.
[IMPROMPTU AFTER CHRISTMAS DINNER.]
It may not be-go maidens, go,