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a flender, a young and an old woman; the accomplishments that can make the one with a great deal of money, and an- marriage state happy. These traders other with none at all: each of whom dipole of all sorts of rich heirs and was severally recommended by thein as heiresses, baronets, lords, ladies of fathe propereit person in the world for thion, and daughters of country fquires, me.

with as much cocineis as drovers fell I know not how it happens, but it is bullocks. They keep compleat registers notorious that most people take a pleac of the condition and qualifications of sure in niaking matches; either thinking all the marriageable perions within the matrimony a itate of bliss, into which kingdom; and it is as common to apply they would, charitably call all their to them for an husband or wife, as to friends and acquaintance; or perhaps the regilter offices for a man or maid ttruggling in the toils, they are dehrous servant. They may, indeed, be confi. of drawing others into the net tnat en- dered as fathers and guardians to the Inared them. Many matches have been great. It part of your youth of both sexes, brought about between two persons, fince in marriage they may be molt proabfolute strangers to each oiher, through perly said to give then away. this kind merisation of friends, who are Ir is something cornical to confider always ready to take upon thin the the various persons to whoin men of this office of an honourable go-between profellion are useful. We may natuSome have come together, merely from Tally luppose that a young fellow, who having been talked of by their acquaint. has no ehate but what, like Tinsel's in ance as likely to make a match : and I the Drummer, is merely personal, would have known a conple, who have met by be gind to come down handsomely after accident at an horse race, or danced to- consommation with a woman of forgether at an assembly, that in less than tuine; and a {mart girl, who has more a fortnight have been driven into ma. charms than wealth, would give round trimony in their own defence, by having poundage on being taken for better for been first paired in private conversations, worfe by a rich heir. Many a tradera and afterwards in the cominon news- man alto wants a wife to manage his papers.

fainily, while he looks after the top; As we cannot insure happiness to our and thinks it better to recommend him. friends, at the same time that we helpdelt by this convenient friend, than by thein to hufbands or wives, one would means of the Drily Advertiser. There imagine that few would care to run the are also several young people, who are hazard of bestowiug misery, where they indifferent as to any person in particumeant a kindness. I know a good- lar, and have no passion for the Itate natured lady who has officiously brought itself, yet want to be married, because upon herself the ill-will and the curies it will deliver thein from the restraint of many of her deareit and mott intiinate of parents. But the molt unnatural, friends on this very account. She hus though very cominon, applications of a lifter, for whom the provided a mout this bort, are from the rich and the noexcellent husband, who has ihewn his ble; who, having immense estates to affection for her by spending her whole beltow on their children, will make use fortune upon his mistrelles: another of the meanett inftruinents to couple near relation baving, by her means, then to others of the fame overgrown snapped up a rich widow, the brideg, ouin fortune. was arreited for her debts within a week I have known many droll accidents after marriage: and it cost her a whule happen from the mistakes of these mere (welvemonth to bring two doating lovers cenary March-makers; and remember of her acquaintance together, who parted one in particular, which I hali here fec beds before the honey-inoon was ex, down for the entertainment of my readpired.

A careful old gentleman came up But if our friends will thus condeo from the North on purpose to marry his fcend to be Match-makers from a fpirit son, and was recoinmended by one of of benevolence, and for our own advan- these Couplers to a twenty thousand tage only; there are others who have pounder. He accordingly put on his taken up the profeffion from less disin. best, wig, belt beaver, and gold buttoned terettet motives; who bring beauty and coat, and went to pay bis respects to fortüge to market, and traffick in all the lady's inamma. He told her, that




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he ha l not the pleasure of being known teen.'-'No.'Or (we must make to het; but as his son's quiet dependled ' allowances) perhaps but tifteen thouon it, he had taken the liberty of waiting • sand.' Net so much, Sir.' Here on her: in short, he immediately broke enfued a profound silence for near a the matter to her, and informed her, minute; wlien the old gentleman, rubthat his boy had seen her daughter at bing his forehead -- Well, Madam, church, and was violently in love with we must come to some conclusion. her; concluding, that he would do very Pray, is it less than fourteen thou: handtomely for the lac, and would make I sand? How inuch more is it than it worth her while to have him. The 'twelve thousand??- Less, Sir.' old laly thanked him for the honour Lefs, Madam?'- Lels. But is it he intended her family; but the supposed, more than ten tiloufand:- Not to to be sure, as he appeared to be a pru- much, Siria Not so much, Madam?" dent and fencible gentleinan, he would "-Not so much.'- Why, if it is expect a fortune antwerable.

lodged in the funds, consider, Madam, • nothing of that, Malam, say nothing ' interest is low, very low; but as the ' of that,'interrupted the Don: I have boy loves her, trifles fhall not part us. • heard--but if it was less, it should • Has the got eight thousand pounds!"

not break any squares between us.'- - Not so much, Sir '--' Why then, • Pray, Sir, how much does the world • Madam, perhaps the young lady's lay?' replied the lady. • Why, Ma- fortune may not be above fix-or five • dam, I suppose she has not less than • thousand pounds.' I NOTHING

twenty thousand pounds.'— Not jo I LIKE IT, SIR.' At these words the much, Sir,' said the old lady, very old gentleman itarted from his chair, gravely. Well, Madam, I suppose and running out of the room Your

then it may be nineteen, or-ormonly • servant, your servant: my son is a • eighteen thousand pounds.'- Not jo • fool; and the fellow who recommend

much, Siri - Wcil, well, perhaps ed me to you is a biockhead, and

not: but if it was only seventeen • knows nothing of business.' & thousand.' No, Sir. Or fix.

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friend of mine was writing A New judiciously affronting, when they meant Treatife on Ethics, or, A System of to complunent, their patrons. The Immoral Philofophy, compiled from the humble Dedicator loads his Great Man principles and practice of the present with virtues totally foreign to his nature age; in which the extraordinary mo. and difpofition, which fit as aukwardly deity of the moderns would be enlarged upon him, as lace or embroidery on a on, which has induced them to com-, chimney-sweeper; and fo overwhelms pithend all the vices, instead of virtues, him with the huge mass of learning with in their idea of a Fine Gentieman. The which he graciously dubs him a scholar, work is now tinished; and the author that he makes as ridiculous a figure as has fent ine the following letter concern- the Ass in the Dunciad. After having ing the Dedication, with leave to submit thuş bepraised his patron, till the new it to the public.

Miecenas is heartily ashamed of himfelf, he wonders that no notice is taken

of so popous an eulogium, and that'a THE Gatness and fullore insipidity Dedicat.on hould be asomere a drug as

a fubject of vur conversation; and we have Lory, in the Relapfe, advifes Fifhion always agreed, that Authors have mif. to get into the good graces of Lord Fops



pington, by falling in love with his naging it with fo much adroitness and coat, being in raptures with his peruke, dexterity, lince you have been acquaintseeming ravished with the genteel dangle ed with it. Nobody cogs the dice, cr of his sword-knot; and, in thort, to re- packs the cards, half so ikilfully: you commend himself to his noble elder hedge a bet with uncommon nicety, and brother, by affecting to be captivated are a molt incomparably threwd judge of with his favourites. In like manner, the odds. the Author, who would make bis De.. Nor have your exploits on the Turf dication really valuable, should not talk rendered you less famous. Let the anto his patron of his honour, and virtue, nals of Pond and Heber deliver down to and integrity, and a pack of unfashion- pofterity the glorious account of what able qualities, which only serve to dif- plates you have won, what matches you grace a Fine Gentleman; but boldly made, and how often the Knowing Ones paint him what he really is, and at the have been taken in; when, for private same time convince him of his merit in reasons you have found it necessary, that being a fool, and his glory in being a your horse should run on the wrong lide scoundrel. This mode of Dedication, of the post, or be distanced after winthough proper at all times, will appear ning the first heat. I need not mention with a particular good grace before A your own skill in Horsemanslıip, and Syitem of Immoral Philolophy: where- in how many matches you have conde. fore, as my book is now finished, I scended to ride yourself; for in this parhave here sent you a rough draught of ticular, it mut be acknowledged, you the Epistle Dedicatory, and shall be glad cannot be outdone, even by your groom to hear your opinion of it.

or jockey.

All the world will witness the many May it please your Grace! or, My Lord! instances of your Courage, which has or, Sir!

been often tried and exerted in Hyde You are in every point fo complete a Park, and behind Montague House; Fine Gentieman, that the following nay, you have sometimes been known Treatise is but a faint transcript of your to draw your sword inost heroically at accomplishinents. There is not one qua. the opera, the play, and even at private lification, requisite in the character of a routes and affeinblies. How often have man of {pirit, which you do not poffefs. you put to flight a whole army of watcha Give me leave therefore, on the present men, constables, and beadles, with the occasion, to point forth your inestiinable justices at their head! You have cleared qualities to the world, and hold up to a whole bawdy-house before you, and the public view fo glorious an example. taken many a tavern by storm: you have

You distinguished yourself so early pinned a waiter to the ground; and have in life, and exalted yourself so far above besides proved yourself an excellent the common pitch of yulgar Bucks, that marksman, by niooting a post-boy fly. Fou was distinguished, before the age of ing. With so much valour and firma twenty, with the noble appellation of ness, it is not to be doubted, but that Stag: and when I consider the many you would behave with the fame intregallant exploits you have performed, the pidity, if occafion called, upon Hounnumber of rasc)ly poltrons you have sent slow Heath, or in Maidenhead Thicket: out of the world, the number of pretty and, if it were necessary, you would as little foundlings you have broughi into boldly resign yourfelf up to the hands of is, how many girls you have debauched, Jack Ketch, and swing as gentedly as how many women of quality you have Maclean or Gentleman Harry. The intrigued with, and how many hog- faine noble spirit would likewife enable hieads of French wine have run through you to aim the pistol at your own lead, your body, I cannot help contemplating and go out of the world like a inan of you as a Stag of the firit head.

honour and a gentleman, What great reason have you to value But your Courage has not rendered yourself on your noble atchievements at you in usceptible of the fofter paflions; Arthur's! The sums you formerly lost, to which your beart has been erer in. and those you baye lately won, are amaz

clined. To say nothing of your gala ing instances of your fpirit and address; lantries with women of fansion, your tirit, in venturing so deeply, before you intrigues with milliners and inantua. waa let into the secret; and then, in ina; makers, or your seducing raw country

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girls girls and innocent tradesmens daughters, as well as established your consequence, you have formerly been fo conttant in in the proper place, by fecuring half a your devoirs to Mrs. Douglass, and the dozen horcughs. As to Religion, you whole lifterhood, that you sacrificed your foon unravelled every mystery of that; health and constitution in their service, and not only know the Bible to be as But above all, witness that iweet delic romantic as the Alecran, but have ailo cate creaturé, whom you have now in written several volumes, to inake your keeping, and for whom you entertain difcoveries plainer ta meaner capacities. fucha Hrong and faithful passion, that, The ridiculous prejudices of a foolish for her sake, you have tenderly and af- world unhappily prevent your publishfectionately deserted your wife and facing them at present: but you have wisemilya

ly provided, that they shall one day see Though, from your elegant taste for the light; when, I doubt not, they will pleasures; you appear made for the gay he deemed invaluable, and be as univerworld, yet these polite amusements have fally admired, as the Porthuinous Works not called off your artention from the of Lord Bolingbroke. more serious studies of Politics and Re. ligion: In Politics you have made such May it please your Grace! or, My a wonderful proficiency, both in theory Lord! or, Sir! in humble admiraand practice, that you have discovered tion of your excellencies, the good of your country to be a mere

&c. &c. &c joke, and confirmed your own intereft, O

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HE notices in the public papers, proportions, and capable of an equal

that the Foundling Hospital will degree of perfection with honelt mabe open for the reception of infants in • dam's issue,' it is furely an act of general under a c'rrain age, have, I find, great bumanity thus to rescue them from given univerial satisfaction. The con.. untimely deaths and other miseries, lequences of a big belly do not appear, which tbey do not merit, whatever may so dreadful as heretofort; and it was but be the gurit of their parents. yesterday, that a young fellow of in- Though it is obvious, that this Hof. trigue told me, he was happy that his pital will be made the receptacle of many children would no longer be thrown out legitiinate children; it is no less certain, of the Hospital, as he himself had been that the rich, as well as the poor, will out of Arthur's, hy black balls. For often send their bale-born bantings to my part, though I have no lady in keep this general nursery. The wealthy snan ing, no child by my house keeper, nor of quality, or fubftantial cit, may hate any other affair of gallantry on my their private fainily-reaions for not ownhands, which makes me with tò lwell ing the fruits of their secret amours, the number of infants maintained by and be glad to put the little living witthat charity, I must own inylélf to beness of their intrigues out of the way. exrecuingly rejoiced at the extension of For this reason, an history of the Foundso benevolent a design. I look upon it lings received there would be very curio as the certain prefervation of inany hun- ous and entertaining, as it would cop." dreds in embrio: nor shall we now hear tain many anecdotes not to be learned of To many helpless babes birth-strangled from any Parish-segister. The reflecin a necessary, or {mothered by the tions that passed in my mind on this

ditch-delivered drab. As a bastard fübiect, gave occafion the other evening is accounted in law, quasi nullius filius, to the following Dreain. the child of nobody, and related to no- Methought, as I was standing at tide body, and yet is blessed with as fair private door of the Hospital where


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trowd of females (each of them with a as well as in their business, have let child in her arms) were pressing to get up a whore and an one-horse chaise in in, an elderly gentleman, whom from partnership together. his white itaff I took to be a governor of . That pert young baggage there the charity, very courteously invited me 6 who so boldly presses forward with her to come in. I accep'ed his offer; and • brat, is not the mother of it, but is having stated mytelf near himn Mra 'maid to a single lady of the stricteft "Town,' says he, ' I am conscious that • honour and unblemished reputationa

you look upon most of these little in. • About a twelvemonth ago, her mistress

fants as the offsprings of so many un- went to Bath for the benefit of her i married fathers and maiden mothers, • health: and ten months after, she tra, ' which have been clandestinely fmuge ' velled into North Wales to see a rela• gled into the world. Know then, that ' tion; from whence flie is just returned. 1 ani one of those guardian Genii, ap- Weinay suppose, that she took a fancy

pointed to superintend the fortunes of to that pretty babe, while in the couna • Bastards : therefore, as this Hospital try, and brought it up to town with,

is more immediately under my tuition, her, in order to place it here: as Mae ' I have put on this disguise; and, if • did a few years ago to another charma ' you please, will let you into the re- ing boy; which, being too old to be cret history of those babes who are my.. got into this Hospital, is now at a wards, and their parents.'

• Ichool in Yorkshire,' where young I assured him, his intelligence would ' gentlemen are boarded, cloathed, and be highly agreeable; and several now educated, and found in all necessaries, coming up to offer their children, he ' for ten pounds a year. resumed his discourse. Observe,' said < That chubby little boy, which you he, that jolly little rogue, with plump • see in the arms of yonder strapping ' cheeks, a forid complexion, blue eyes, "Wench in a cainhlet gown and red • and fandy locks. We have here al- • cloak, is her own loa. She is by pro'ready "several of his brethren by the • fction a bed-maker in one of the upia • mother's fide; some fair, fome brown, "" veilities, and of the same college, in • and some black: and yet they are all ' which the father (a grave tutor) holds

supposed to have come by the same fa. a fellowship, under the usual condi ther. The mother has for many years

•dition of not marrying. Many liber been honsekeepet to a gentleman, who gentlemen of the cloth, who are in the cannot see that her children bear the ' fame scrape, are glad to take the benemarks of his own ferýants, and that ' fit of this charity: and if all of the

this very brat is the exact resemblance fame' reverend order, 'like the priests • of his coachman.

abroad, were laid under the same ree . That puling whining'infant there, Itrictions, you might expect to see a • with a pale face, emaciated body, and particular Hospital erected for the re'distorted limbs, is the forced product ception of the Sons of the Clergy.

of viper- broth and cantharides. It is * Thaç next child belongs to a femin the offspring of a worn-out buck of captain's lady, whose husband is ex., quality, who, at the same time he des pected to return every moment from

bauched the mother, ruined her con- • a long voyage; the fears of which • Aitution by a filthy disease; in confe- have happily haltened the birth of

quence of which, she, with much dif- this infant a full month before it's • ficulty, brought forth this just image 'tiine. That other is the polthumous • of himself in miniature.

child of a wealthy old gentleman, who • The next that offers, is the issue of married a young girl for love, and died • a careful cit; who, as he keeps an ' in the honey noon. This his son and • horse for his own riding on Sundays, beir was not born till near a twelve• which he lets out all the rest of the month after his decease, because it's • week, keeps also a mistress for his re- birth was retarded by the excessive • creation on the seventh day, who

lets grief of his widow; who on that ac• herself out on the other lix. That Count rather chose to lie in privately, • other babe owes his birth likewise to ' and to lodge their only child here, than • the city; but is the joint product, as to have it's legitimacy, and her own

we may fay, of two fathers; who be. • honour, called in question by her bur, • ing great ceconomists in their pleafures, i • 'band's relations."


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