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Enter LIMBERHAM. Limb. Why, how now, Pug? Nay, I must lay you over the lips, to take hansel of them, for

my welcome. Trick. [Putting him back.] Foh! how


smell of sweat, dear!

Limb. I have put myself into this same unsavoury heat, out of my violent affection to see thee, Pug. Before George, as father Aldo says, I could not live without thee; thou art the purest bed-fellow, though I say it, that I did nothing but dream of thee all night; and then I was so troublesome to father Aldo, (for you must know he and I were lodged together) that, in my conscience, I did so kiss him, and so hug

hug him in my sleep! Trick. I dare be sworn 'twas in your sleep; for, when you are waking, you are the most honest, quiet bed-fellow, that ever lay by woman.

Limb. Well, Pug, all shall be amended; I am come home on purpose to pay old debts.—But who is that same fellow there? What makes he in our territories ? Trick. You oaf you, do

you not perceive it is the Italian seignior, who is come to sell me essences ?

Limb. Is this the seignior? I warrant you, it is he the lampoon was made on.

[Sings the tune of Seignior, and ends with, Ho, ho.

Trick. Prythee leave thy foppery, that we may have done with him. He asks an unreasonable price, and we cannot agree.—Here, seignior, take your trinkets, and be

Wood. [Taking the box.) A dio, seigniora.

Limb. Hold, pray, stay a little, seignior; a thing is come into my head of the sudden.

Trick. What would you have, you eternal sot? the man's in haste.

Limb. But why should you be in your frümps, Pug, when I design only to oblige you? I must present you with this box of essences ; nothing can be too dear for thee.

Trick.Pray let him go, he understandsno English.

Limb. Then how could you drive a bargain with him, Pug ?

Trick. Why, by signs, you coxcomb. Limb. Very good! then I'll first pull him by the sleeve, that's a sign to stay.-Look you, Mr Seignior, I would make a present of your essences to this lady; for I find I cannot speak too plain to you, because you understand no English. Be not you refractory now, but take ready money; that's a rule.

Wood. Seignioro, non intendo Inglese.

Limb. This is a very dull fellow! he says, he does not intend English. How much shall I offer him, Pug?


present me, I have bidden him ten guineas.

Limb. And, before George, you bid him fair. Look

you, Mr Seignior, I will give you all these. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, and 10. Do you see, Seignior?

Wood. Seignior, si.

Limb. Lo' you there, Pug, he does see. Here, will

you take me at my word ? Wood. [Shrugging up. ] Troppo poco, troppo poco.

Limb. A poco, a poco! why a pox on you too, an' you go to that. Stay, now. I think on't, I can tickle him up with French ; he'll understand that, sure. Monsieur, voulez vous prendre ces dix guinees, pour ces essences ? mon foy c'est assez.

Wood. Chi vala, amic: Ho di casa ! taratapa, taratapa, eus, matou, meau !--[To her.] I am at the end of my Italian; what will become of me?

Trick. If you

Trick. [To him.] Speak any thing, and make it pass

for Italian; but be sure you take his money. Wood. Seignior, io non canno takare ten guinneo possibilmentè; 'tis to my losso.

Limb. That is, Pug, he cannot possibly take ten guineas, 'tis to his loss : Now I understand him; this is almost English.

Trick. English! away, you fop; 'tis a kind of lingua Franca, as I have heard the merchants call it; a certain compound language, made up of all tongues, that passes through the Levant.

Limb. This linguâ, what you call it, is the most rarest language! I understand it as well as if it were English; you shall see me answer him: Seignioro, stay a littlo, and consider wello, ten guinnio is monyo; a very considerablo summo.

Trick. Come, you shall make it twelve, and he shall take it for my sake. :

Limb. Then, Seignioro, for Pugsakio, addo two moro : je vous donne bon advise : prenez vitement : prenez me à mon mot.

Wood. Io losero multo; ma pergagnere il vestro costumo, datemi hansello.

Limb. There is both hansello and guinnio; tako, tako, and so good morrow.

Trick. Good-morrow, seignior; I like your spirits very well; pray let me have all your essence you can spare. Limb. Come, Puggio, and let us retire in secreto, like lovers, into our chambro; for I grow impatiento sbon matin, monsieur, bon matin et bon jour.

[Exeunt LIMBERHAM and TRICKSY. Wood. Well, get thee gone, 'squire Limberhamo, for the easiest fool I ever knew, next my naunt of fairies in the Alchemist.* I have escaped, thanks

Dapper, a silly character in Jonson's Alchemist, tricked by an astrologer, who persuades him the queen of fairies is his aunt.

to my mistress's lingua Franca : I'll steal to my chamber, shift my periwig and clothes; and then, with the help of resty Gervase, concert the business of the next campaign. My father sticks in my stomach still; but I am resolved to be Woodall with him, and Aldo with the women.




Wood. Hitherto, sweet Gervase, we have carried matters swimmingly. I have danced in a net before my father, almost check-mated the keeper, retired to my chamber undiscovered, shifted my habit, and am come out an absolute monsieur, to allure the ladies. How sits my chedreux ?

Gerv. O very finely! with the locks combed down, like a mermaid's on a sign-post: Well, you think now your father may live in the same house with you till doomsday, and never find you; or, when he has found you, he will be kind enough not to consider what a property you have made of him. My employment is at an end; you have got a better pimp, thanks to your filial reverence.

Wood. Pr’ythee, what should a man do with such a father, but use him thus ? Besides, he does journey-work under me; 'tis his humour to fumble, and my duty to provide for his old age.

Gero. Take my advice yet; down o' your marrow-bones, and ask forgiveness ; espouse the wife he has provided for you ; lie by the side of a wholesome woman, and procreate your own progeny in the fear of heaven.

Wood. I have no vocation to it, Gervase : A man of sense is not made for marriage; 'tis a game,


which none but dull plodding fellows can play at well; and 'tis as natural to them, as crimp is to a Dutchman.

Gero. Think on't, however, sir; debauchery is upon its last legs in England: Witty men began the fashion, and now the fops are got into it, 'tis time to leave it.

Enter ALDO.. Aldo. Son Woodall, thou vigorous young rogue, I congratulate thy good fortune; thy man has told me the adventure of the Italian merchant.

Wood. Well, they are now retired together, like Rinaldo and Armida, to private dalliance; but we shall find a time to separate their loves, and strike in betwixt them, daddy. But I hear there's another lady in the house, my landlady's fair daughter; how came you to leave her out of your catalogue ?

Aldo. She's pretty, I confess, but most damnably honest; have a care of her, I warn you, for she's prying and malicious.

Wood. A twang of the mother ; but I love to graff on such a crab-tree; she may bear good fruit another year.

Aldo. No, no, avoid her ; I warrant thee, young Alexander, I will provide thee more worlds to conquer.

Gerv. [Aside.] My old master would fain pass for Philip of Macedon, when he is little better than Sir Pandarus of Troy.

Wood. If you get this keeper out of doors, father, and give me but an opportunity

Aldo. Trust my diligence; I will smoke him out, as they do bees, but I will make him leave his honeycomb.

Gerv. [ Aside.] If I had a thousand sons, none of

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