Obrázky na stránke

titioa seemed to produce fresh encou,

cedent to faith-that repentance, hoxe ragendent, mixed with determination, ever acceptable to God, is neither a re. if he might, to cast his 'perishing soui commendation to his mercy, nor the on the Lord Jesus Christ for salvation.sensc of this anencouragement to hope ini He had not been taught, nor was he then him-that nothing in man, not even faith aware, that any, and every sivner, was itself, is the ground of acceptance with warranted and enjoined to do so. He God--the ground of recommendation anc? supposcd, on the contrary, that some encouragement being one arid the saine, jyior gracious qualification must entitle viz. the atonement of Christ finished on him to this privilege. He could not fat. the Cross. He was much instructed and ter himself that he possessed any such warned, confirmed and comforted at this qualification, so that his resolution seem time by a poor inan; a thrasher employed like that of Esther, iv. 16. contrary ed in his fatlier's barn, with whom he á law. However it was, he determin. prayed and conversed, and to whom he ed to cast himself on Christ, faintly hop- opened all his mind; and as he in this iog that he might save his soul, and if way stopped his work, he made up for not, that he could be but lost. In such it by thrashing for him sometimes an agitations he continued above an hour, hour or two together. In March 1770, weeping, and making supplications for he for the first time witnessed a baptizmercy.

ing; for it should seem, neither his 12. - lle now deserted his companions, rents nor the Church were over anxious avoided and forsook scenes of templa. respecting the practices by which they tion. To those objects, a glance at were distinguished from other Christians, 'which would a short time before have About a month after, he was hiinseff 'set his soul. In fame, he now became barstized on the profession of repentance dead, and the first desire of his heart and faith, being then two months more was devotion to his Lord and Saviour. 'than 16 years of age, and was afterlle was ever solicitous to 'mention that 'wards added to the church. He endur. the delay and the imperfection of the ed much reviling on account of being test which his troubled soul obtained at dipped, but he never changed his n:ind this time were occasioned by his suppos- respecting it, and bestowed only silerit ing that he was hot warranted to come pitý and prayers in return for contempt. to Christ, without the consciousness of The attachment between him and the possessing some previous recommenda- church was now warm and mutual. tions. If he had been taught or 'had The pastor, though his senior by four known the true grace of God as clearly 'and twenty years, became his bosom as it is revealed, and as he was afler. "friend.' He was a recluse man, lored wards instructed in it, he conceived he "reading, and had a reflecting niind. His should not so long have been kept in 'conversa; ion was thus peculiarly interestdarkness, despondency, and distance from "ing to young Fuller, whose powers were God. I am inclined to be a little parti. then beginning to evolve. Great were cular here, because his sentiments have the enjoyments of which he ihen par. certainly been misapprehended upon this · took. A case, ho vever, not long after subject. He did indeed believe that re. ' occurred, which mixed them with sorgeneration and repentance were in the row. He happened to be the first who order of nature previous to faith in Christ.. knew of an offence having becń commit. Whether this sentiment be or be not ted by one of the members; and went founded on the Scriptures is not now the to him in consequence, according to the énquity; nor whether it implies that rule of our Lord, Matth. xviii. 15–18. conscious penitence is requisite to en- to admonish him respecting his sin. The courage a Sinner to come unto God. excuses he alledged, and the steps which Most assuredly it did not imply this in followed, brought it before the Church. his mind. It was his fixed and uniform In the course of the discipline, adiscussion persuasion from which he never swerv'd, took place of various doctrines respectbut always zealously inculcated and main- ing the power of fallen man to obey tained that no person can, or ought to God, and to keep himself from sin, with derive any relief to his conscience from other relative sentiments. Great cisa the distress of his mind onaccount of sin; greement arose out of this, and many nor any encouragement to approach un- disputes, which eventually ended in the to God from feelings within him, or division of the Church, the resignation from any experience or disposition ante. of the pastor, and his removal elsewhere.

[ocr errors]


These contentions, which lasted nearly hints from any part of the word of God?" a whole year, Mr. Fuller used to call, Conscious of what had been passing " the wormwood and gall of his youth.”, through his mind the day before, as he Yet to these, under God, he ascribed was absent who usually addressed them, almost all his future views, and the lead. he judged that it might be his duty to ing events of his life. If he judged try; and, therefore, making no excuses, wrote to any good purpose, it was then which he thought would be mere affecThe would say,) “ he learned to do so by 'tation, (the object of his disgust constitubitter experience.Nothing now was tionally), he rose and spoke for about half Jooked for, but the dissolution of the an hour with some degree of freedom. Church. For several weeks, he went to A few weeks after he again attempted another place. Those members, how- the same, in consequence of repeated ro ever, who kept together, appointed a quests; but finding little or no freedom, day for fasting and prayer, and invited he was discouraged ; and though often all who were scattered to unite in this. requested, declined for nearly a year.He accepted the invation, and from that In 1973, the usual speaker being absent time' continued with them. One of the from affliction, he was induced to renew deacons, who had considerable acquaint- the attempt, and spoke from these words ance with the Scriptures, was requested of our Lord, Mat. xviii. 11, “ The son to spend some part of every meeting in of man is come to seek and to save that reading and expounding the Word, and which is lost.”. On this occasion, he felt this, with singing and prayer by the more liberty than ever, and several perChurch, filled up the worship.

sons were much impressed with the disAbout the end of 1771, his mind was

From this period, the church much ernployed in ruminating on various seemed to entertain thoughts of his en. passages of Scripture. Thoughts flowed gaging in the ministry'; and occasionally upon him respecting these ; and though he himself felt a desire towards it, checkhe had not the most distant idea of the ed however by many discouragements. Ministry, he felt as if he could have But against these also other arguments preached on things which appeared to and influences prevailed ; so that dur. him so very affecting. A propusition ing the course of that year, his friend was soon after this made to him to go the Deacon and he, alternately addressed to a trade, to which he had been for the Church. His discourses were blessmerly inclined ; and his mother, judg. ed to several young persons, who aftering the gospel to be gone from the place wards joined them. In January, 1774, of their residence, procured a situation one of the members died; and it was for hina where he might hear it every requested, if not thought disorderly, Lord's day.' The religious connections, that he should preach a Funeral Sermon. however, into which he had now entered, By this time, the Church being all nearimperfect as were the advantages attend. ly of one mind, appointed a previous ing them, he knes not how to leave- day for fasting and prayer; and gave Feeling compassion for their desolate him an unanimous call to be their Pascircumstances, and a wish, like Lot's, tor on the 26th of that month. to see what would become of the city, he Often did he reflect on what he afterdetermined to remain where he was.- wards saw--his own slender qualifica. On the morning of the Lord's day after tions at that time for the office, and, this, he received a message from the when he knew the want and the worth Deacon who usually conducted their of leisure, he deeply regretted how little worship, saying, that he had got a hurt, he had improved what he then possessed. and could not attend the meeting; and The Church had but little knowledge, the messenger added that he had said, and no one suggested to him his defi. “ The Lord be present with you.He ciencies. Happy for those young preachwondered what this could mean. He ers and ministers who are otherwise had never engaged in any public service dealt with and happy are those who

had never expounded the know in what spirit to receive the ado Scriptures, nor attempted any such thing. monitions of friendship and brotherly On coming to the meeting, after singing, love, or even remarks which may seem a brother went to prayer ; and another indelicate and severe.

C. S. of the Deacons said to him, “ Brother

(To be concluded in our next.) Andrew, will you read, and drop a few

but prayer ;



TO SCOTLAND: The inhabitants of this city have knowledge, was set, in the most been much refreshed by the visit Rivid colours, before a very nix of several brethren from England, 'merous assembly, and every heart deputed by the London Missionary seemed to beat with intense anxiety, Society, to plead the cause of that to send to them the blessings of the excellent and important institution, gospel. in Scotland. On Saturday, June On the following day, sermons 10th, a meeting of the Edinburgh were preached at various places of Auxiliary Missionary Society, was worship in this city, on behalf of the held in Corri's Rooms. Messrs. same object. The collections, we Waugh, Fletcher, and Steven, (Mr. understand, both at Corri's Rooms, Slatterie, had not then arrived), ad- and the places of Worship, on the dressed the Meeting, and Mr. Camp- Sabbath, were liberal; we are not bell gave a most interesting account at present, however, able to give of considerable length, of his late : them correctly. Our respected journey in South Africa. We have friends have left Edinburgh, to fulseldom seen so strong an impression fil, the remaining part of their misproduced upon any Meeting in E- sion, in different parts of Scotland. dinburgh. The affecting condition May the presence of God go with of the heathen perishing for lack of them




Julp 19, 1815.


(Continued from page 209.) MR. ENGLISH kept a journal of the principal pccurren

ces of the last twenty-five years of his life, and of the most remarkable parts of his Christian experience. In the early part of this diary, and not long after his second marriage, he observes, “ Lord what a heart is mine, to require so many trials! Yet all I fear and all I feel seems too little to answer the end, which is to take away my sin. I have a distressed house, and a hard beart. How am I fallep from God! I am tried in body, mind and family; yet I trust the Lord will be with me, My people feel for me in my trials, and show great sympathy and affection, and manifest their concern by suitable conduct. Thus the Lord stays his rough wind in the day of his East wind. If he puts bitters into one cup, be puts sweets into another."

He soon after observes, “ Man is born to trouble. This I daily feel; but I am not tried equal to my sins. I have many mercies to alleviate my crosșeș. May I at the last be able to say, The angel of the covenant has redeemed me from all evil-from the evil of sin-from the curses of a violated law; the evils attendant on the frowns and smiles of the world and the church; the evils of wealth and of poverty; of health and afflictions ; of death and hell! Precious salvation ! My soul is in safe bands. My Saviour is able to save unto the very uttermost, all that come unto God by him. But I must be saved as by fire. I must again go into the furnace: what Vol. II. No. 6.

2 H

gold of gracious principles I possess, is still mixed with drose, and the gold must be refined. I am again tried in my family --my dear Mary is very ill. I do not feel my mind reconciled to what I often fear. Death would be her gain, but my loss; a loss to which I feel it hard to be resigned. Lord, conquer my will and make it yield to all thy will, whether for life or for death! Self-will is a source of misery to our. selves, and to our connections. I fear I have a severe trial at hand; but, Lord, thy will cannot be wrong, nor can it be resisted. Nothing but good can come from thee, who art the fountain of goodness. All the sufferings of thy people must terminate in their good; for whom thou didst foreknow, thou didst predestinate to be conformed to the image of thy son. The means must be good which accomplish so noble an end."

Mary was spared for a short time to the hopes of the fond parent, but one of his sons was seized with affliction. On this occasion Mr. English writes, “ The Lord appears to be about to take my dear William. Lord, he is thine by creation, preservation, redemption and dedication-I wish to resign bim to thee; I doubt not of thy mercy towards him graciously sanctify the rod to us. I feel great struggles in giving him up, but his pains appear to be so acule, that his death begins to be looked for rather as an object of desire than of fear.” Again, he writes, “ We have now taken leave of our son, by solemn surrender of him unto God in prayer, fully persuaded that the dissolution of these earthly ties, will ultimately promote a union with the Father of spirits. We felt our minds resigned, and were contented that the Lord's will should be done." The next morning the child was released from its agonies, and his father writes, “ The Lord gaveand the Lord hatli taken away, blessed be the name of the Lord.” On the fourth day from this he says, “ Our dear little girl is very ill, we are called to resign her also; Lord help us to do it in a right frame.” The next day he observes, “ This evening, Mr. Rowland Hill buried my dear boy, and just before his interment, news came of the death of my

little girl. Lord, all I am and all I have is thine ! Mr. Hill preached from these words, . I die daily.' These are deaths even to survivors, but none but parents know what parents feel.” At another time he says, "What changes are we perpetually exposed to ! If a state of affliction is a mark of' divine favour; I certainly have that; but, on this I would place no dependence, for this of itself is no evidence of a safe or gracious state. My dear child Eliza is now under affliction. Our fears are alarmed-mine are so, not only on account of the unfavourable symptoms of her complaint, but from a conviction, that by our conduct we tempt the Lord to take our

« PredošláPokračovať »