I'd rather suffer for my faut,

A hearty flewit,

As sair owre hip as ye can draw't,

Though I should rue it.

"Or gin ye like to end the bother,
To please us a', I've just ae ither-
When next wi' yon lass I forgather,

Whate'er betide it,

I'll frankly gie her't a' thegither,

And let her guide it."

But, sir, this pleased them warst ava,
And therefore, Tam, when that I saw,
I said, "Guid night," and cam awa',
And left the session ;

I saw they were resolvèd a'

On my oppression.

THE AUTHOR'S EARNEST CRY AND PRAYER

TO THE SCOTCH REPRESENTATIVES IN THE HOUSE OF COMMONS.

SEE the introduction to the poem entitled "Scotch Drink," p. 60, for an account of the circumstances which induced the composition of the following.

"Dearest of distillations! last and best!

How art thou lost !"-Parody on Milton.
YE Irish lords, ye knights and squires,
Wha represent our brughs and shires,
And doucely1 manage our affairs

In parliament,

To you a simple Bardie's prayers

Are humbly sent.

Alas! my roopit* Muse is hearse !2

Your honours' heart wi' grief 'twad pierce,
To see her sittin' on her a-e

Low i' the dust,

And scraichin' + out prosaic verse,

And like to burst!

Tell them wha hae the chief direction,
Scotland and me's in great affliction,
E'er sin' they laid that curst restriction
On aqua vitæ ;

And rouse them up to strong conviction,
And move their pity.

1 Seberly.

2 Hoarse.

* A party suffering from hoarseness and a dry, tickling cough, is said to be roopy or roopit.

The meaning of this phrase cannot possibly be conveyed by any single English equivalent. Fancy a person with a sore throat trying to screech, or the noise the common hen makes when she is enraged, and some idea may be found of the meaning of the verb.

米

Stand forth and tell yon Premier youth,*
The honest, open, naked truth:

Tell him o' mine and Scotland's drouth,1
His servants humble:

The muckle devil blaw ye south,

If ye dissemble !

Does ony great man glunch and gloom?
Speak out, and never fash your thoom! 3
Let posts and pensions sink or soom

4

Wi' them wha grant 'em :

If honestly they canna come,

Far better want 'em.

In gath'rin' votes you werena slack;
Now stand as tightly by your tack;
Ne'er claw your lug," and fidge" your back,
And hum and haw;

But raise your arm, and tell your crack
Before them a'.

Paint Scotland greetin's owre her thrissle,
Her mutchkin stoup as toom's9 a whissle;
And damn'd excisemen in a bussle,

Seezin' a stell,

Triumphant crushin' 't like a mussle

Or lampit shell.

Then on the tither hand present her,
A blackguard smuggler, right behint her,
And cheek-for-chow a chuffie1o vintner,
Colleaguing join,

Picking her pouch as bare as winter
Of a' kind coin.

Is there, that bears the name o' Scot,
But feels his heart's-bluid rising hot,
To see his poor auld mither's pot

Thus dung in staves,

And plunder'd o' her hindmost groat
By gallows knaves?

Alas! I'm but a nameless wight,

Trod i' the mire and out o' sight!

But could I like Montgomeries fight,†

Or gab like Boswell, +

+ Colonel Hugh Montgomery, then representing Ayrshire, who had seen service in the American war.

James Boswell of Auchinleck, the biographer of Dr. Samuel Johnson.

There's some sark-necks I wad draw tight,
And tie some hose well.

God bless your honours, can ye see't,
The kind, auld, cantie carlin greet,1
And no get warmly to your feet,

And gar them hear it,

And tell them wi' a patriot heat,

Ye winna bear it?

Some o' you nicely ken the laws,
To round the period and pause,
And wi' rhetoric clause on clause

To make harangues;

Then echo through St. Stephen's wa's

Auld Scotland's wrangs.

Dempster, a true-blue Scot I'se warran'
Thee, aith-detesting, chaste Kilkerran ; +
And that glib-gabbet2 Highland baron

The Laird o' Graham ;+
And ane, a chap that's damn'd auldfarran,3
Dundas his name.§

Erskine, a spunkie Norland billie;
True Campbells, Frederick and Ilay; T
And Livingstone, the bauld Sir Willie ;
And mony ithers,

Whom auld Demosthenes or Tully

Might own for brithers.

Thee, Sodger Hugh, my watchman stented,
If bardies e'er are represented;

I ken if that your sword were wanted,

Ye'd lend your hand :

But when there's aught to say anent it,
Ye're at a stand.**

**

Arouse, my boys; exert your mettle,
To get auld Scotland back her kettle;
Or, faith! I'll wad my new pleugh-pettle, 5
Ye'll see't or lang,

She'll teach you, wi' a reekin' whittle, 6

Anither sang.

*George Dempster of Dunnichen, Forfarshire.

Sir Adam Fergusson of Kilkerran, then member for Edinburgh.

The Marquis of Graham.

§ Henry Dundas, afterwards Viscount Melville.

Thomas Erskine, afterwards Lord Erskine.

Lord Frederick Campbell, brother to the Duke of Argyle, and Ilay Camp

bell, then Lord Advocate.

**Colonel Hugh Montgomery, as member for Ayr, was looked upon with a poet's licence as his special watchman in the matter.

of the verse is to his imperfect or ineffective elocution.

The allusion at the end

This while she's been in crankous1 mood,
Her lost militia fired her bluid;
(Deil na they never mair do good,

Play'd her that pliskie !2)

And now she's like to rin red-wud
About her whisky.

And, Lord, if ance they pit her till't,
Her tartan petticoat she'll kilt,
And durk and pistol at her belt,

She'll tak the streets,

And rin her whittle to the hilt

I' th' first she meets !

For God's sake, sirs, then speak her fair,
And straik her cannie wi' the hair,

And to the muckle House repair

Wi' instant speed,

And strive, wi' a' your wit and lear,
To get remead.

Yon ill-tongued tinkler, Charlie Fox,
May taunt you wi' his jeers and mocks;
But gie him't het, my hearty cocks!

E en cowe the caddie !3

And send him to his dicing-box

And sportin' lady.

Tell yon guid bluid o' auld Boconnock's*

I'll be his debt twa mashlum bannocks,+

And drink his health in auld Nanse Tinnock's+

Nine times a week,

1 Ill-tempered, restless.

2 Trick.

3 Fellow.

* William Pitt was the grandson of Robert Pitt of Boconnock, in Cornwall. A mixture of oats, beans, peas, and wheat or barley flour.

A worthy old hostess of the author's in Mauchline, where he sometimes studied politics over a glass of guid auld Scotch drink.-B. "Nanse linnock is long deceased, and no one has caught up her mantle. She is described as having been a true ale-wife, in the proverbial sense of the word-close, discreet, civil, and no tale-teller. When any neighbouring wife came, asking if her John was here, 'Oh no,' Nanse would reply, shaking money in her pocket as she spoke, 'he's no here,' implying to the querist that the husband was not in the house, while she meant to herself that he was not among her half-pence-thus keeping the word of promise to the ear, but breaking it to the hope. Her house was one of two stories, and had a front towards the street, by which Burns must have entered Mauchline from Mossgiel. The date over the door is 1744. It is remembered, however, that Nanse never could understand how the poet should have talked of enjoying himself in her house 'nine times a-week. The lad,' she said, 'hardly ever drank three half-mutchkins under her roof in his life.' Nanse, probably, had never heard of the poetical licence. In truth, Nanse's hostelry was not the only one in Mauchline which Burns resorted to: a rather better-looking house, at the opening of the Cowgate, kept by a person named John Dove, and then and still bearing the arms of Sir John Whiteford of Ballochmyle, was also a haunt of the poet's, having this high recommendation, that its back windows surveyed those of the house in which his 'Jean' resided. The reader will find in its proper place a droll epitaph on John Dove, in which the honest landlord's religion is made out to be a mere comparative appreciation of his various liquors."-CHAMBERS.

If he some scheme, like tea and winnocks,*
Wad kindly seek.

Could he some commutation broach,
I'll pledge my aith in guid braid Scotch,
He needna fear their foul reproach
Nor erudition,

Yon mixtie-maxtie, queer hotch-potch,
The coalition.+

Auld Scotland has a raucle1 tongue;
She's just a devil wi' a rung;2

And if she promise auld or young

To tak their part,

Though by the neck she should be strung,
She'll no desert.

And now, ye chosen Five-and-Forty,+
May still your mother's heart support ye;
Then though a minister grow dorty,3
And kick your place,

Ye'll snap your fingers, poor and hearty,
Before his face.

God bless your honours a' your days
Wi' sowps o' kail and brats o' claise,5
In spite o' a' the thievish kaes"

That haunt St. Jamie's!

Your humble poet sings and prays

While Rab his name is.

POSTSCRIPT.

Let half-starved slaves in warmer skies
See future wines, rich clust'ring, rise;
Their lot auld Scotland ne'er envies,

But blithe and frisky,

She eyes her free-born, martial boys
Tak aff their whisky.

What though their Phoebus kinder warms,
While fragrance blooms and beauty charms!
When wretches range, in famish'd swarms,
The scented groves,

Or, hounded forth, dishonour arms

In hungry droves.

*Light and air not being so highly valued then as now, Pitt had gained credit for a remission of a part of the duty on tea at the expense of the winnocks (windows).

Mixtie-maxtie and Hotch-potch.-Scotch phrases for a mixture of incongruous elements.

The number of Scotch representatives.