cafion? He told me, Juvenal had written a very fevere fatire (the VIth) against women, which I should fee very much to its advantage, if I would confult Mr. Dryden's tranflation of it. For Simonides, he told me, he had written lambics against them, in which he divides them into ten forts. The firft he faid was defcended from a fow, (you will find very noble families among them, madam) and she was fluttish: The fecond from a fox, and the understands every thing, and has a great deal of good in her, and a great deal of ill too: The third from a dog, and she is prying about, and fnarling at every body: The fourth is made of the earth, and she underftands nothing but how to fill her belly, and fit by the fire-fide: The fifth of the fea, and fhe is changeable and inconftant; fometimes in a calm, and then on a fudden in a ftorm: the fixth is made of afhes, and a labouring afs, (an odd compofition you will fay) and fhe is fcarce driven to her bufinefs with threatnings or force, but crams herfelf night and day, and lies with every one that comes; (now whether she takes this quality of lying with all who come, from the father's fide, or the mother's fide, I cannot abfolutely determine.) The feventh was defcended from a pole-cat, and she is naufeous and ftinking: The eighth from a mare, and she never cares to do any work, and minds nothing but appearing neat and fine: The ninth from a monkey, and her uglinefs is a jest to every body: The tenth from a bee, and fhe makes an excellent wife. There is a ftory alfo of this Simonides, that being asked about a wife, he faid, fhe was the shipwreck of man, the tempeft of a house, the difturber of reft, the prison of life, a daily punishment, a fumptuous conflict, a beast in company, a neceffary evil. And † + Camerar. Hift. Lib. 3. Cap. 11, On Matt, Chap. xix, St St. Chryfoftom, befides the homily upon the beheading St. John Baptift, which is almost all an invective against women, says in another place, what is a wife? The enemy of love, the inevitable pain, the neceffary evil, the natural temptation, a defirable calamity, a domeftical peril, a pleafing damage. Thus you see these, ancients, madam, had a very commendable faculty of calling names: What think you, might not the matrons of Billingsgate improve in their conversation? But it is natural when people cannot convince our reason to endeavour to move our paffions. I know you will object against these, Anacreon, Theocritus, Catullus, Tibullus, Ovid, Horace, Propertius, and all those poets and wits, ancient and modern, who pleas'd themselves, whilft they lived, in the purfuit of women, and have render'd themselves immortal after their death, by the trophies they raised to them. It is confeffed, that spending their time upon the fex, they ought to know them beft: But on the other fide, to excufe their own spending their time, ought to represent them as favourably as poffible; and yet, pray what is the account they give us of them? Do they not all with one confent complain, either of the cruelty or falfhood of their mistreffes? Are not their books full of quarrels, piques and jealoufies? and do they not fhew the levity, perjury, and lewdness of the fex; Does not § Anacreon, and a hundred more, tell you, they mind nothing but wealth? (This complaint of the love of wealth, and invectives against it, has been very ancient, and very gene § Γένος ἐδὲν εἰς ἔρωτα Σοφίν, τρόπος πατεῖτας, ra! Horace, ral amongst the poets; befides this Greek, +Ovid, Tibullus, and || Propertius, make them, a mongst the Romans; § Marino, ** Guarini among the .fore enim tutum iter & patens Converfo in pretium deo, Lib. 3. Od. 16. fpeaking of Jupiter and Danae. + Ingenium quondam fuerat pretiofius auro, T At nunc barbaria eft grandis, habere nihil. Ad dominam faciles aditus per carmina quæro : At mihi per cædem & facinus funt dona paranda. Sed pretium fi grande feras, cuftodia victa eft, Nec prohibent claves, & canis ipfe tacit. Lib. 2. El. 4. Nulla eft pofcendi, nulla eft reverentia dandi. Aut fi qua eft pretio, tollitur ipfa mora. Aurea nunc verè funt fæcula, plurimus auro. Forte cor, falda voglia, intera fedé ? Anch egli amor lo ftrale Già d'oro, e d'or lo cocca Là doue ogni altra punta Lib. 3. El. 11. D'impiombate quadrel fi fpezza, e spunta. Mar. Rim. par fecunda Canzon, 15. L'oro. ** Le Richezze, li Tesori Son infenfati Amori. Paft. Fido, Chor, del Atto 2do. Italians Conde de Villa Mediana, and † Quevedo amongst the Spaniards; Ronfard among the French; and Cowley amongst use for you must know, madam, these poets were a fort of people, who were never very remarkable for their making large jointures; their estates generally lie upon Parnaffus, where land lets worse than it does in Ireland: Nor do I remember to have read in any hiftory, of poets who deferr'd the enjoyment of their mistreffes for the drawing of writings.) Does not § Theocritus make continual complaints of the cruelty of his mistress? Does not * Catullus tell you, that his Lesbia lay with all the town? and that what any woman fays to her lover, ought to be writ in wind, or running ftreams? Does not Tibullus complain, that he had taught his mistress to deceive her guards fo long, that she learnt to deceive him too? Does not || Ovid lie *De tus flechas por fer d'oro 1. Ninguna lei fe deffiende. El Rico eftà en toda parte, Siempre a propofito viene,. No ay cofa que fe le efconda, No ay puerta que fe le cierra. Quey. Thal. Rom. 37. Celui devroit mourir de l'Eclat du Tonnerre Qui premier defcouvrit les mines de la terre. Ronfard. El. 8. 'Tis all against the love of money. Idyll. 3. 10, 11, 14, 20.' 12 *Illa Lefbia quam Catullus unam + Plus quam fe atque fuos amavit omnes, mulier cupido quod dicit amanti, In vento, & rapidâ fcribere oportet aquâ. Catul. 59. Cuftodes, eheu nunc premor arte meâ. Lib. 1. El. 7. Excubui claufam fervus ut ante domum, lib. 3. El. 11. at at his mistress's door all night, whilft an inconfiderable fellow has got into her arms? Does not Horace com. plain of the cruelty of two miftreffes, and the perjury and the inconftancy of three or four more? And does not Propertius, befides his own Cynthia's falfhood, cry out of the incontinence of the fex in general? I know not what your fuccefs in love may have been; but till you tell me the contrary, I can hardly believe it better than thefe mens. For what qualification can there be to make a woman kind and conftant, that they had not? Anacreon appears to be one of the gayest humour'd men that ever was born; Theocritus the most tender and natural in his poems; Catullus was without a rival the greatest wit of his age; Tibullus was not only the smootheft and delicateft of the Roman poets, but also the most beautiful perfon of his time; Ovid and Propertius, as neither of them wanted love, fo never had any a more foft and tender way of expreffing it; and Horace, befides the talent of crying up his miftreffes, and pleafing their vanity that way, had the pleasantest manner of expofing the follies of his rivals, and the feverest of revenging the falfhood or unkindness of his miftreffes, of any man in the world. And yet none of all there could, by their own confeffion, keep a woman to themselves, or even teach them cunning enough to jilt them fo, that they should never find it out; which Ovid tells us frankly, was all he defired from them. г § Lib. 1. Od. 23. Lib. 3. Od. 10.-26. * Lib. 1. Od. 13. Lydia, Lib. 2. Od. 8. Barine, Lib. 3. od. g. Lydia again, Epod. 15. Neæra. † Lib. 2. El. 18. upon Cynthia's falfhood. Lib. 3. El. 17. De incontinentiâ mulierum. See Lib. 1. Od, 25. Lib, 3. Od. 15. Lib. 4. Od. 13. Epod. 8. 12. Non ego ne pecces cum fis formosa, recufo; Lib. 3. El. 14. |
