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thousand worms, and that there are thirty-two millions of AN HOUR WITH THE SALVATION such acres. Now, at the rate of each worm twenty ounces, each acre annually receives on its surface from below ten
ARMY. tons yearly, which gives three hundred and twenty million tons of worm-soil made in England alone. With these A religious movement which in its fourth year of operfigures before our minds, let us conceive, if we can, the re ations claims some of the largest congregations to be found in sults of worm-labor throughout the world. What would most of our great towns, must surely be worthy of attention. they be for one year?
When it is added that these congregations are mostly drawn Now to my point. Here are animals endowed with in from that “non-worshipping" population over which clerstincts which compel them to transform the useless into gymen, moralists, and philanthropists are accustomed to useful, to grind and mix with secretions peculiarly their wail in despair, the movement becomes interesting beyond own, for the secretion of which they are endowed with all proportion to the mere numbers it may affect. glands expressly peculiar to themselves. And this not for Statistics might be given to justify these remarks, but their own use. Some authorities have doubted whether they are needless. Concurrent testimony, confirmed by the worm derives any nourishment whatever from the raw our own observations in London, shows that this movement materials which it thus transforms; but Mr. Darwin is of affects poor abandoned souls whom almost every device of opinion that it does derive some, but it seems that this is preaching or ritual has hitherto failed to bring within the only in the way of accident, as a cook may pick a currant sound of the gospel. Let all have their due, even if we feel while making her mistress a cake, or as the ox may snap a constrained to protest against practices which we deprestray ear of corn while treading the mill-round of the cate. When we think of the raving, riotous, profane rabble threshing-floor. But when it swallows mere mineral earth, fairly dragged at the tail of the Army in its marches through it is not for purposes of nourishment or of the palate. At the streets, and almost forced to confront the tremendous the surface, nourishing vegetable fare is near at hand; fare alternative of heaven or hell, we find a new light on the which is rich and palatable, for which, be it remembered, words of the gospel, “the kingdom of heaven suffereth vioit has a relish and evident enjoyment, yet this it deliber- lence, and the violent take it by force.” ately leaves behind, and works for something outside of The Lord of peace and truth did not speak of himself, in itself-for the soil, for the fruits of the earth, and for man! these words. The stupendous power of his divine life, by The whole of what is known as vegetable mould of the sur
which he drew men to himself, was quiet as the might of face of the earth has passed and will repass, Mr. Darwin gravitation. The sun makes no noise is swaying the planesays, through the bodies of worms every few years through tary worlds. The supremacy of Christ's love was not that the world's history. Nay, more, long before history, be of the storm, but of sunshine which no frosts can resist, and fore even man appeared on the earth, says Mr.· Darwin, beneath which no seeds of life can long sulk in darkness. "the land was, in fact, regularly ploughed, and still con “It is enough for the servant that he be as his Master." tinues to be ploughed, by earth-worms. It may be doubted,” | Alas, if he only could! It is hard for a puny asteroid to imhe continues, "whether there are many other animals
itate the sun. Its nearest attempt is a petty volcanic ex. which have played so important a part in the history of the plosion of pent-up forces. It should be content to reflect world as have these lowly-organized creatures."
the sun. But those rough Galileans whose speech bewrayed What thoughts and feelings should such facts stir! Long them in priestly, rabbinical Jerusalem, did not, it would apbefore the appearance of man upon the earth, the earth pear, always content themselves with the “still small worm was patiently and skillfully preparing the soil in
voice." They carried their habitual violence into religion; which man's lilies and roses were to bloom, the herbs were and they “took the kingdom of heaven by force." This is to grow for his camel and sheep, and corn and wine, to what the Salvation Army do likewise. It may be impossimake glad man's heart. If born of these facts there does ble to help wishing that they were milder-mannered. But not succeed to the first sense of wonder at the forethought if they really do drag captives with them as they scale the and goodness of the great Father a sense of gratitude, over
walls of heaven, who would not wish them God-speed ? whelmed by a sad, almost tearful, sense of unworthiness,
And they do! There can be no doubt about that. Inconwe must indeed be "past feeling." Whenever we look at sistent converts, backsliders, mercenary pretenders, there the earth worm and the little spiral coil of mould it erects may be among their recruits; but that they have been the upon the ground, our feeling should be one of reverent love means of making many drunkards sober, and of taming to the Eternal Glory from whom, by these unsuspecting many a lawless ruffian, and rousing thousands of careless means, such good gifts descend.- London Sunday Magazine. souls to inquire, “What must I do to be saved ?" is too no
torious to be denied. Let us tell our own experience of one WHAT IS PRAYER?
of their meetings, held at the headquarters of the “First Whitechapel Corps," as it is called. There is a special in
terest attaching to this place of meeting, for it is here that The words came strangely from her lips, When thus she questioned, “What is prayer?"
the movement originated. The “East London Mission" For I, who knew her heart so well,
had used the hall for many years, when Mr. Booth, a little Could look and find the answer there.
more than three years ago, conceived the idea of organizing
the Salvation Army. With that organization, with its afHer life's a prayer, and she, like John, Leans trusting on her Saviour's breast;
fectation of military titles, and its uniform, we need not There e'en a whisper will suffice,
now concern ourselves. “Men are but children of a larger And in that whisper there is rest:
growth.” And the "Army,' equally with the "Good Temp
lars" and the Ritualists, have found, we suppose, some adRest from the care of self, and rest
vantage in appealing to the childishness that survives in From all the daily fret of life. Where could she better work and help
grown-up people. But this is not of the essence of the Those who are lonely in the strife?
movement: let us go into their hall, and try if we can find
out what is.
In a wide thoroughfare, almost as crowded and bustling
on Sunday evening as on Saturday, we see a dense throng Who ever gently whispers, “Come!"
round a wide gateway, and, were it not for the fact that
public houses are the only places of ordinary resort privi When at last they cease, the young man with the symleged to be open on this day, we might suppose we were bolic helmet at once leads off in prayer. Only a month ago approaching the entrance of a penny theatre. The dress his Sunday evening's amusement was to throw hricks-bats at and language of the jesting throng suggest that, and noth- the army. Now, with a fervor that struggles vainly against ing else. The same idea is favored by the brightly-lighted poverty of language, he beseeches a blessing on the work. vestibule, at the end of which are doors opening into the It is noticeable that he does not speak in the plural, but in hall. We pass in, and find some six or seven hundred peo the singular, as though he were praying alone. "Oh, my
ple already assembled. It is nearly seven o'clock, but the God!" he cries, "bless this meeting. Let souls be converted er Whitechapel First Corps" has not yet arrived. It is this night. On, my God! bless us now." It is impossible
marching through the streets singing hymns of triumph, to suppress a doubt as to the wisdom of allowing such recent and striving, by the aid of brazen instruments, to overbear converts to appear so prominently. But all is so strange to the clamor of an opposition force now regularly marshalled us here that our ideas are somewhat topsyturvy, and we to shout it down; or, in the absence of the police, to adopt forbear criticism. At any rate, there is no possibility of more summary methods. A glance at the audience con doubting the lad's earnestness now. We are told he has to vinces us at once that it is one of a very unusual character. bear a good deal of persecution; as he is the son of a pubThe proportion of the male sex is certainly larger than or lican whose house is much frequented by the Opposition dinary, and they are nearly all youthful. Amongst the Army, we can well believe it. We earnestly hope he may women there are many of middle age, worn and weary- endure to the end. looking. But amongst the men nearly all are young; in After two more prayers, another hymn is raised, happily fact, a large number of them are mere lads, and precisely this time without the ophicleide. Everything in the serthe sort of lads who appear, as though by magic, in scores vice is so spontaneous that several times hymns are raised whenever there is a chance for a fight or other entertainment without announcement. Some voice leads off in wellin the streets. A balcony runs round three sides of the ball, known words—this time it is “My Jesus, I love thee; I while at the end a platform rises in several steps, like an know thou art mine"--and instantly several hundred voices infant-school gallery. On the wall above this platform are join in, the people all retaining their seats. On these occasome startling appeals in big letters"Will you go to sions the brass band is taken unawares and is left behind, heaven, or hell?” “Let God have his own way," and others but each man fingers his instrument as though determined more familiar.
to come in somewhere; and they generally succeed, regardAGEN We have hardly time to look round when the sound of less of pitch, before the end of the hymn.
singing, half-drowned in riotous cries and jeers, reaches us The reading of Scripture is not followed with much atfrom the street, and the “corps" marches in, followed by a tention. In fact, fidgeting and whispered conversations are tumultuous crowd that surges up into the balcony, or sub- general. The preaching, which consists not of one discourse, sides into the vacant seats below. The band with their but of several brief exhortations, is—at least on this occabrazen instruments take their places prominently on the sion-more remarkable for energy of delivery than for pagallery in front of us, and we note with some alarm a por- thos, or striking illustration. Still there are points that tell tentous ophicleide, almost big enough to blow the roof off. on the audience. One of the preachers, it seems, had a The army knows no distinction of sex in the holy war. shopmate who is an admirer of Mr. Bradlaugh's. Said he There are women taking their places as lieutenants and cap- -"One of Mr. Bradlaugh's friends-God bless and save the tains of the force, and in some of their faces it is impossible man; I don't want to speak of him with any disrespectto mistake the saintly look of pure self-forgetful devotion but one of his friends told me the other day at the bench, which we mark in pictured saints whose eyes gaze into he didn't believe this and he didn't believe the other. "Come eternity. Amongst the recruiting band, who take their now,' I says to him, 'what do you believe?' 'Oh,' said he, seats fronting us, is a youth by no means of prepossessing 'I've never thought about that.'” It will easily be under
countenance, who, we learn, was the originator and organ stood what use is made of this. Referring to the moral in1.
izer of the "Opposition Army,” but who now, in token of dolence which will not face responsibility, the same preacher his new allegiance, has a symbolic helmet sewn on his coat; remarks: “They say, if God wants to save me, why don't and we fervently hope it truly represents the helmet of he save me? But they won't let him." Meantime, with salvation.
all the elements of a dangerous riot at the back of the meetWithout ceremony, without announcement, some voice, ing, the leader shows admirable tact and coolness. When we know not where, strikes up a lively hymn, beginning, a preacher somewhat ludicrously cracks his voice and has “I'm a pilgrim for glory,” and running continually into a to pause for breath, this leader, without moving from his refrain of question and answer,
seat, instantly raises a hymn and gives the orator time to "Are you ready? Yes, I'm ready,
When jeers and mimicry from the roughs become Only waiting till the Master comes."
annoying, he says quietly, "Now then, aisle-keepers, look The lively energy with which this is everywhere caught up after them chaps. There's a lot of fellows come in here just shows that the majority are habitual attendants. Then a to help the devil by upsetting our meeting. Keep an eye brother in a uniform, a sort of cross between that of a po on them.” And the proceedings go on again as though liceman and a rifleman, gives out a hymn from a book, and nothing had happened. the ophicleide betrays ominous tokens of activity. The cor One thing that touched us deeply is the impassioned denets take up the strain, and the multitude join in heartily votion again and again manifested to the Friend of Sinners. again. If they could only drown the ophicleide all would It was said of old, “at the name of Jesus every knee shall be well, but it is a tremendous instrument, much too strong bow.” And here not only knees, but hearts are bowed by even for the whole force of the army, and as it rarely ever that name. “He left the glorious Heaven, and came down hits the right note, our hypercritical ears undergo some tor- | amongst sin and suffering for you—for you!” “Ay, for
me, ture. But, bless the man, his heart is in it! He blows as if bless him; ballelujah!” cries a poor, toil-worn woman near he were before the walls of Jericho, and their fall depended “There's one verse of a hymn tells my experience," on his lungs. The discord does not in the slightest degree says a young man, suddenly rising on the platform, "and I disturb the singers. Indeed, they enjoy their efforts so want you to sing it. It's this: "All hail the power of Jesus' that at the close of the hymn they are loath to leave off, and name.'” Instantly the old tune of Miles' Lane is raised! sing the last two dines over and over again.
but when they come to “crown Him Lord of all," the rep
tition provided in that tune is not enough for them. They him and pray over him. Hundreds of voices are singing, have got an addition to it, which goes on quavering and “I will believe, I do believe, that Jesus died for me." And twirling on the word "crown" for several moments, and it why not for him, too? Yes, glory to God, he must believe. is an unmistakable happiness to the army and their con Christ is his Savior, too. It is surely the spirit of Christ verts thus to celebrate the Captain of their salvation. Now, that works in him such hatred of sin, such longing to do what cathedral music can, in genuine pathos, equal this? better. And if Christ be for him, who can be against him ? From foul alleys, from reeking gin-shops, from drunken He is a saved man. A strange, joyful assurance of a better fights, and brutal excesses, these people have been dragged future for him takes possession of his heart. The bondage into a light amazing to them as the vision Paul saw at mid- of corruption is broken. He is, at last, entering the gloriousday. Selfishness, greed, passion, they could understand liberty of the children of God. before, but the love that knows no aim other than the sal. Let us go. We have seen some things that a little startle,. vation of the lost, is a revelation that overwhelms them perhaps almost shock us. And we hear of many doings in with incredible yet resistless beauty. And they have be this army which we must distinctly reprobate, especially in lieved it. Pierced by its tender reproach—“Thou that killest its unwise dealings with children. But if the power of God the prophets and stonest them that are sent unto thee"- to heal sin-stricken souls was not present to-night, we. wooed by its pleading, they have yielded to its inspiration; hardly know what signs would prove it. As we walk away: and now old things have passed away, all things are become through the gloomy streets simmering with fretful humannew. Instead of drink and filthy jesting, they find delight ity, eloquent of profound spiritual needs, there runs in our in praise and work for God. Instead of the triumph of sel- | head, we hardly know why, the scornful indignation of fish violence, they have the unutterable peace of a complete Blake: surrender to God's will. Comparing their present with
Mock on, mock on! Voltaire, Rousseau! their former lives, they feel themselves already on the
Mock on, mock on,-'tis all in vain.. threshold of Heaven. And should they not love him who,
You throw but sand against the wind,
And the wind blows it back again!" at such a tremendous cost, wrought this deliverance for
-London Sunday Magazine. them? Well may they sing with heart and voice! There is a music in such gratitude which even an ophicleide out
PLATFORM AND PERSONAL EXof tune can not mar. Yes; we have been in many stately cathedrals, but we avow, never in them did we seem to
PERIENCES.* catch so clear an echo of the anthem of the redeemed. The theme is the saine above and below-ay, and the feeling is
LADIES AND GENTLEMEN-I have ever regretted the nec one: “Worthy is the Lamb that was slain to receive power,
essity of a title for a lecture. I was once asked why I did and riches, and wisdom, and strength, and honor, and glory,
not preach. My reply was, I should forget my text in five and blessing!”
minutes. And if I announced, as a title, the ground I hope " Sudden conversions cease to be incredible to us. A
to occupy,-if my strength holds out, and your patience,poor wretch who has been assaulting his wife and starving would contain it, and the reading thereof would be weari
and all the topics I should like to touch upon, no hand-bill his children, while he has drunk himself to the borders of the grave, comes in here, and the first word he hears is that
some and bewildering. I have selected a title: "Platform “the devil is a hard master.” Well, that is a self-evident
and Personal Experiences." I shall give incidents, desproposition to him. It never occurred to him in just that
cribe scenes, relate anecdotes, and offer opinions and sugway before, but now he becomes suddenly aware that he is
gestions, and the lecture, if it may be called a lecture, will carrying a real hell within him. The preacher tells a story public life not altogether confined to the platform.
contain some results of more than thirty-eight years of of a man who found a wonderfully good master, and goes “Now I have found a good master; I used to serve
Now, my audience by this time expect from me neither Satan; but I heard of a master who paid better wages, and
logic nor argument, neither unity nor rhetoric, nor anything I turned out on strike. My new master promised me good
else that constitutes what is termed eloquence or oratory, work, with peace of conscience here and rest afterwards.
and I suppose I shall remind you of a man who was conHe's paid me regular so far, and I know he will to the end, stantly surprising his employer, a farmer, by doing very and my children knows it, and my misses knows it too."
strange things. One day the farmer went into the barn Hallelujah! that's me,” responded a glad woman in the
and found that the man had hung himself. Looking at the gallery. “There's lots of people here serving a bad master.
body, he said, “What upon airth will that feller du next?" He has given them many a aching head and many a aching
Do not expect that I am going to try to bring to you someheart. And the little uns get it, and the poor wife gets it, thing new. There is nothing new under the sun, and some and it's all bad to everybody. The devil never did anyone
persons prefer the old to the new. A man went into a store a good turn. He never lifted up a man in his life. If he did,
and asked, “Have you anything new or fresh ?”
“Yes; it was only to knock him farther down." The
that paint you are leaning upon is fresh.” (Great laughter.) wretch
poor who listens feels how true this is, and begins to wonder if
Now, I shall proceed to give you some personal experithere is any chance for him to “strike” too. His life be
ences, and I shall allow myself the very largest liberty in
wandering: comes darker and more dreadful with every word he hears,
This lecture, if it may be called a lecture, and if he does not utter the words, the thought is in his
must necessarily be personal. It is not egotistical. But I heart, “What must I do to be saved ?" And then he is told
must answer a few questions, for many are asked me in the
course of my life in reference to my public speaking, perhow there is a way of escape, how "God so loved the world," how Jesus went about doing good to just such miserable sonally. Now, some feel it a cross to speak, and others feel souls as he is, and how the same Jesus carried their burden
it a cross not to speak. I advise both to take up their cross. of sin and sorrow up to the bitter death of Calvary. Nay, he
This was the remark of a very shrewd man, and whether it hears that the spirit of this Jesus is actually in the assem
be sound or not, I will state that I have been for thirty-eight bly, and that all who yield to him are now saved from their
years a cross-bearer as a public speaker. I have never
known a time that I did not dread an audience; and the sins, and may hope for strength to lead a pure and happy life. The zeal, the conviction, the moral excitement around
very first sight of the assembly depresses me most fearfully. him are contagious. He falls into an agony and a trance. * A lecture by John B. Gough, Esq., delivered in the AmphitheaHe is struggling between life and death. People come to ter at Chautauqua Lake, New York, August 15, 1881.
I have often directed the chairman of the meeting at which up the other. This action on my part is utterly involuntary, I was to speak to make a few remarks; yes, a good many this fixing on an individual. It is, as I say, involuntary. remarks. I remember when I first faced an audience in Once in a while I have tried all efforts to move men. I London, in Mr. Spurgeon's Tabernacle, when we had 6700 remember one man who was very stolid, and he sat as if admitted by ticket. I said to Sir Charles Read, “Make a he was going to ask the question, “What are you going to speech, Sir Charles, make a speech.” And after he had do next?” I worked very hard, and I thought, "Perhaps. made a speech I began mine with faltering and with tears. he has a comical element in his constitution;' and I tried I remember once walking with my wife ten minutes up and a funny story. I went on telling stories, and I said to mydown the street in Boston, before I dared to go into the hall self, "I must conquer that man or I can not make a speech; where I was to speak. A man says, “That is all affecta if I don't move him I can not make a speech." I was tion.” I tell you I have never been able to overcome the bound to succeed. By the looks of his face I saw I was. unaccountable dread of a public audience. After the first right, and I said, "I am sure of you now.” I told another nervousness is passed, I have no sensation except to make story, and he laughed, and then I had a fine time. the audience acknowledge dominion over their wills and Another question is, “How do you prepare your lecaffections. If I succeed in this, and especially if they are at tures ?" That is a difficult question to answer without some all responsive, the fear is all gone. There comes a conscious- analysis of myself. For the first seventeen years of my ness of power that exhilarates, excites and produces strength, public work I spoke entirely on Temperance, nothing else. thrilling and delighting. And for that, all speakers have to I delivered more than 5,000 addresses on the subject of Tempay most fearfully afterward, This is especially so when I perance; 1,160 of them in Great Britain. Now, I never have been placed in new and strange circumstances, asked to wrote one line of a speech on Temperance, or committed perform some new public service. When I was in London I one sentence to memory on Temperance. To be sure, in was asked to conclude divine services with prayer. I turned conversation, and in traveling, and in reading, I collected to my wife and said, "Mary, what shall I do?” She said, incidents, and facts, and arguments, and illustrations. I "You had better go up to Dr. Parker, and explain to him." store them in the mind, allowing them to float on the surSo I got into the pulpit. Many of you have seen it, a mag- face, ready when required. nificent thing; it is very high, and he stood on a little plat When I was in Sherburne, England, the great aetor, form. I said, "Dr. Parker, I can not pray here. If I was Macready, came on the platform and asked me to breakfast. alone I could pray; but now I can not lead the devotions of with him the next morning. We entered into conversation. this great congregation.” He said, "I have got you here, He asked me, "Do you commit your lectures to memory? and you must do something. Give out the twenty-eighth Do you write them?” “No, sir." "Then you have in your hymn after my prayer.” So, after the prayer, I rose, and I mind what you are to say?" "No, sir." I then began: forgot the platform, and he said, "stand on the platform," Drunkenness is an evil, and it is our duty to do all we can I said, “Will you now sing the twenty-seventh-the twenty to remove the evil. And so on. I knew that I had certain eighth hymn," and I gave out the first four lines, and at facts and arguments and illustrations; but how I was to the conclusion of the last line I dropped like a "Jack-in weave them in I did not know. I will illustrate that point.. the-box." That was absolute suffering. I suppose I ought Whatever I can make use of I use freely. Now, at Rhineto be in the spirit of prayer, but to lead the devotions of beck I was to speak on the subject of Temperance. I was others has always been a cross to me, and I have always entertained by Mr. Freeborn Garretson, at his beautiful esshirked it. I can not help it, I can not understand it, and I tate. It was in the winter-time, and we went out walking can not account for it. A gentleman asked me yesterday to on the grounds in the afternoon; and he said, “I wish you! conclude the service with prayer, but I could not.
would come in the summer-time. Our trees have no foWhen Mr. Finney was in Edinburgh, in 1857, he and his liage, no beauty now. Come in the summer-time, and you wife called on us at the hotel, and there were four of us, will see us in our glory, when you will enjoy the glad re-Mr. and Mrs. Finney, and Mr. and Mrs. Gough. We had freshment of the shade under these trees." I thought nothsome conversation, and among other things, I said to Mr. ing of it. As I went to the lecture, a man said, "I am glad Finney, "I am afraid I am in the seventh chapter of Ro you are come to Rhinebeck." I began to speak, and I used mans.
"What?" “I am in the seventh chapter of Ro the words of Mr. Garretson. I spoke of the Temperance mans." "Then we ought to pray about it.” And we all cause, and said, “There's not a green thing, or bud or blogknelt down. He said, "Mr. Gough, pray." I said, "I don't
But sir, it is winter-time now. The gap is in want to pray.” Said he, “I command you to pray.” “Mr. the trees, and the warm sun will shine by and by on these Finney, I won't pray.” Then he said, "O God, have mercy branches, and in the sultry day, you will have the warm upon this unbeliever."
rain; it will water the roots; you will have the bud and At a lecture in a church in London a minister was asked blossom and leaf, and the branches will hang so thick;" and to open the meeting with prayer. He prayed for the idola soon I got a big tree, and all the drunkards coming under it trous, for the Afghans, for the country, for all others, for for comfort and refreshment. Now, I had no idea of using the speaker, and for those who were instrumental in getting these thoughts when I heard them; but I try to do the very up the meeting, and at the conclusion of the prayer, he best thing I can every time, and to speak as if I was never said, “Were you satisfied with my supplications ?” [Great going to speak again, and use up all the material I have goto laughter.] There are some who can pray, and then ask It has been said "Gough is a mere story-teller.” I should: questions about it.
like to know how many have come merely to hear the story. Then I am asked, "Do you see your audience as individ- This is true in a certain sense. As far as my temperance uals or in the aggregate ?” My experience is possibly the lectures are concerned that may be true. When I began to experience of every public speaker; and I don't mean to speak it was the very night I signed the pledge. I was igcriticize any public speaker whatever; but to me there is norant, as I said on Saturday-no education. I had never an involuntary selection of the persons to whom I am to read a book of history or science; never thoroughly studied speak. My will has nothing to do with it, and when I have an hour. Study to me was only a term-perfect ignorance once selected them it is not possible to change. In the lit as far as educated men would call ignorance. I stood up to tle speech Saturday afternoon, my eye rested on a lady, the speak; what could I do but tell a story? It was a story not most stolid woman I ever saw, and then on a man fast clothed in beautiful thoughts, not very literary, not very asleep; and I could not get a smile from the one, or wake logical, but it was a story—a story of privation and suffering,
a story of struggle and victory; a story of gloom and bright- although I have been sorely annoyed. Arguments are of ness; a story of life; a story of despair and hope; a story of no avail. It is not argument that conquers. But if you God's infinite mercy; a story every word of which I felt in can think of an apt story, or make some remark that can the deepest depths of my soul. I am a story-teller; I have put the laugh upon your opponent, you have the power related the story of other men's experiences, and I have over him. A man in the gallery annoyed me exceedingly, tried to tell the story of the Cross; and I thank God to-day and under the gallery were a lot of liquor-sellers exceedwith my whole heart that there are some men who have ingly tickled to hear this man swear at me. When he would heard my story, and have been stimulated to make the re say something particularly insulting, they would cheer. I maining chapters of their lives better and nobler and truer. thought of a story. I said, "My friend, you are too goodI am perfectly willing to be called a story-teller if I may looking a man to be engaged in such a mean, contemptible win a single soul from vice to virtue, warn the unwary, and business as this. You are doing the work of the men unstrengthen the weak.
der the gallery. There was a man who stammered very Yes, but “Gough is merely a retailer of anecdotes." I badly. Some one came into his office and said: 'Can you have a keen sense of the ridiculous; I can not help it; and tell why it was that Balaam's ass spoke?' 'Yes,' said he, when I get hold of a story I use it. Some of the most ridic 'Balaam was a stutterer and got his ass to speak for him.'" ulous things I read, with all due regard and respect to the I had no more disturbance from the man in the gallery. parties, are some criticisms on myself. Some of them begin A friend of mine in London possessed this power of repwith “Gough is not a thinker!" What do they mean? I artee in a remarkable degree. Any officious person that never think? I am not a profound thinker; never professed undertook to interrupt him got the worst of it, even if he to be. Some men are so profound that with my plummet I was right. On one occasion he was talking on Temperance, can not sound the depths of their profundity. I do think and noticing the religious element without which the temoccasionally-once in a while. But if I were to come before perance cause must die, and a man interrupting, said: you and profess (some of the gentlemen on the platform “We don't want any religion here. You keep religion profess to be deep thinkers) to be a deep thinker, what where it belongs. And” pointing to the gas-burner, "the would you say? Why, I am reminded of a young man who man who invented gas did more good than all the religion." had been speaking in meeting very glibly, and in the con Some one said: "Put that man out-put him out." "No," cluding prayer these words were said: “Now, Lord, we said the speaker, "don't put him out. He speaks from his pray thee to bless our young friend, and prick him, and let all stand-point, not ours. If we were dying, on the verge of the wind out of him.” And he went down like a collapsed eternity, we should need the consolation of religion. We balloon or the stick of a sky-rocket. Now, I did once see in should send for the minister of the gospel. But if this man a paper this remark: “Gough's sense of the ridiculous is was dying, he would send for the gas-fitter.” There was no not original.” There it was! I must have borrowed it, or argument in it, but it extinguished him. got it somehow or other! Now, when I find a good story, I Only once have I been so completely embarrassed that I use it. I am showing you this afternoon how it is done. could not overcome it. I am telling this against the wishes Some are related by others; I use them all; they are public of my wife. At home I am willing to play the lieutenantproperty. I have seen persons in my audiences jotting governor, but on the platform I shall tell this story. In down the stories I have told. [Laughter.] I could tell you 1845 I smoked somewhat. I was to speak to an assembly of the story of the boy who went to see the grand picture of children. Those were the palmy days in Boston when we the Christians thrown to the lions. It was a beautiful pic- could get up meetings of three thousand children. I was ture. The boy looked at it carefully, and when he came to speak to those children at two o'clock. Walking along home he was asked how he enjoyed it. “I enjoyed it very the street a man said: "I have got some of the best cigarg." much," he said, “but I was awfully sorry for one of the I said: "I haven't any place to put them.” “Put them in poor little lions who hadn't got a Christian."
your cap." I didn't choose to wear a stove-pipe hat whilst Now, if I wished to illustrate the point that circumstances I was speaking, so I foolishly put the cigars into my own change or modify our opinions of the same facts, I should cap. I stood before the two thousand children, and began tell the story of the man who put up at a forlorn-looking to speak to them about bad habits, and how hard it was to hotel, in a very forlorn town. “What a miserable place break them; and by and by I got on to the Temperance this is,” he said. After supper he went to the bar and went question; and I said: “Let's give three good hearty cheers to drinking, and, soon getting to gambling, he lost his horse [laughter), hurrah! hurrah! hurrah!” and away went the and buggy, and he got drunk, and the landlord pitched him cigars. I wished the platform would fall. But to add to out into the gutter. Afterwards he said: “I lost one hun my trouble a man passed up one of the cigars saying: “Mr. dred and fifty dollars, lost my horse and buggy, and got Gough, here is one of your cigars." I gave it up--the habit, drunk; and a right-smart place for business this is.” I mean. (Laughter.)
I have been once or twice perplexed by endeavoring to Some one asked another, “Have you seen a dog anywhere use a quotation. And I would say to any speaker, unless on the road?" “Yes, I've seen him and a wolf, and they he is apt indeed, never commit to memory quotations to were just going it, nip and tuck, and the dog was a leetle repeat on the platform. If you must, you are gone. On ahead."
one occasion in London I began: "Locke says, 'We are A young man was asked about the shapeliness of his born-,' Locke says, “We are born— ;' but, well, I suplady-love's foot, when he said: “It's splendid; it's sym pose we are born; but what we are born for in this connecmetrical; delicious. It's a splendid foot, but somehow it tion, I can not inform my audience." I utterly forgot the never made the impression upon me that her father's did next word. (Laughter). one night.” (Long continued laughter.] Now you take a Now, a public speaker has few opportunities of hearing man who can not appreciate a joke, and he will say: “What others, and my principal reason for coming to Chautauqua in thunder has her father's foot to do with it?"
was to hear. I told Dr. Vincent if he would give me plenty Like all public speakers, probably, I have been placed in of leisure I would come. I do not often hear a public embarrassing circumstances. A certain amount of self- speaker. I have never heard Wendell Phillips.
My work possession has been necessary to overcome expected oppo- begins in October and ends the first of June. In the sumsition, especially in the early days of the temperance move mer I never heard but one political speech. It is not be ment. I have never been entirely put down by opposition cause I do not want to hear speakers. I have heard but