Weep for your soules and seed, let these presages
of saddest woes awake your feares and cares :
gods presence is with-drawing by degrees,
and leaues you to condole these obsequys:

Oh what heart-rouzing preachers haue of late,
paid natures debt and slept the sleep of death
What heaven-rending wrestlers changd their state
loathing to liue when those tune-d out their breath
Both these fore seeing foggy vapours rising
from Englands crying crimson provocations
And heavens thicken with black clouds devising
to pour upon us doleful desolations

they stept aside under the gloomy shade
of death, and there in safety are close laid:

These savoury quicksented saints espying
a spiritual famine in this lower region,
Put off their flesh, took wings, departed flying
to feast themselues with the cælestial legion:
these actiue soules, observ'd a blow preparing
to slay the witnesses against the beast
and lest their useles liues, or deaths, declaring
what god hath done or wil doe with the rest,
gaue us the slip and from the stroke wthdrew
and did a civil death therby eschew

O what endeared thoughts, and tender care,
had these beloved female saints to those,
that spiritual fathers and succesful were,

soules to beget to christ and truths disclosed their armes and hearts were open to embrace, gods faithful preachers, and his saving word his house they loved, and his beauteous face, longing for more injoyments with the lord: At best they could but see here through a glasse and therfore longd to god by death to passe

And now they are arrived at their port

that joyful haven of eternal rest

those staggering stormes at sea whose bare report astonish mortals, these from them are blest

These happy soules are gone aboue the sun
yea glorious suns are in heavens firmament
no sun-light need they, glory is begun,
grace perfect is, god is their sole content:
let us hasten to these blessed joys

and leaue our sins, and loads, and worldly toys.

per me O H

The life of Alice Heywood, my dear and precious mother, observed and collected by O H

She was born in Longworth near Walmesley chappel in Bolton parish in Lanc: about the year 1594: she was the onely daughter of her father, she had four brothers, William, Francis, Hugh, and Ralph Critch-law, and most of these being effectually wrought upon by grace while she was but yong she wondered at their zeal, and could not imagine what ailed them to keep such a stirre in praying, reading, and runing to sermons, &c Yet she liked them the better for their forwardnes in these ways of god and dutys of religion, tho she had little sense of these things as yet upon her own heart, for (as she hath often told me) she was as careles, carnal, and froward as any til she was about 19 years of age, at which time it pleased god to take to himselfe her gracious mother, whom she tenderly affected, and for whose death she made excessiue sorrow, wch heart-breaking providence was seconded with an heart-convincing ordinance, and with gods blessing upon both, for at that time there lived a godly young minister at the place, one Mr Joshua Hill, whom the lord used as an instrument to open her blind eyes, to convince her heart of her dangerous estate by nature, and the dreadful guilt attending the commission of every actual sin, so that her heart was overwhelmed under sad apprehensions of divine wrath, she even roared by reason of the disquietnes of her spirit, oh the bitter pangs and torturing throws her soule felt in this spiritual travel, her very moysture was dryed up with bitternes of soule, in wch selfe-lamenting plight (at the next door to despair) she continued too ful years, stil suffering gods terrours, and refusing to be comforted, thinking her condition without paralel, and far worse then ever any bodys else was, and that ther was no hopes of mercy for so vile a sinner And that wch lay very heavy upon her heart was that she had not been so careful to follow her dear, dead mothers example

and instructions, for the things of her soule, tho she was very observant to please her in other things: it broke her heart exceedingly that her mother was gone to the graue with tears for her, and had not seen the return of her prayers and successe of her endeavours for her conversion: there were indeed many concentring causes of her excessiue soul-trouble, the sin of her nature, and the vile nature of her sins, therby dishonouring god, crucifying christ, grieving the spirit, and undoing her soule and many aggravating circumstances that brought her soul to the gates of hel, and her body nigh unto the graue : one passage I haue often heard her relate that upon that day upon wch she used to goe to Bolton, and be most jocund with her companions, she did afterwards with-draw her selfe into a little out-house near her fathers, and took her bible with her and spent the whole day in reading and praying, self-examining and selfe-judging excercises, there she took her fil in bitter crys of godly sorrow, and hearty groanes for pardoning mercy, that

fasting and solitarines being an holy revenge upon 2 cor 7 11] her selfe for her former mirth and vanity, though she had not been addicted to grosse prophanes, yet youthful wantones was her bitter affliction; for a wounded spirit hath a fruitful fancy to multiply and magnify smallest circumstances, and render them intollerable: when her Brothers perceived her continuing too long in that little coat, some of them came to take her off and bring her home, telling her, she must pitty her body, and that god wil haue mercy and not sacrifice, she answered she cared not wt became of her body, so her heart might be laid low enough for sin :

Her soul-troubles were so great, and her doubts so many that several experienced persons took great pains to comfort her, but almost in vain, Mr Hill who was the means of her casting down laboured much to raise her up, lest she should be swallowed up with over-much sorrow he had a tender respect to her, and sometimes in company would haue pointed to her and said, this is one of my lambes, wch expression wrought wonderfully upon her heart, Ah thought she, what am I that any of gods messengers should own such an unworthy wretch that I should be called a lamb that am liker a wolfe, and deserue not to come into christs fold among his people; many selfe-abasing and self-condemning thoughts she had, and was nothing in her owne eyes, and if she perceived that any thought or spoke wel

of her it did rather humble her then lift her up, yea it did the rather break her heart, because she thought she was not so good as they took her to be; and if they knew how vile she was they would not praise her, for none had so bad an heart as she was burdened with :

Amongst others of her spiritual helps her brothers contributed much, especially her youngest brother (Ralph) was more endeared to her through suitablenes in age, but especially in soule-troubles for he also was wrought upon about the same time, and too precious gentlewomen living near, were her companions in this soul-tribulation (who afterwards were Mtris Barton and Ms Crosse) whose loue and friendship continued with much tendernes til death though removed far asunder:

Another singular assistant to her in her soule-troubles was that auncient and eminent servant of god James Horrocks, whose advice in those days was as an oracle, and the lord blessing him for abundance of good to many soules. She complained of back-wardnes to duty and that she came so unwillingly to god sometimes that she had better let all alone, for god loues chearful worshippers: this he satisfyed by telling her it was a state incident to the best of gods children, and could she expect to be better then David, who said, since then o lord I forget my selfe (as tis in the meeter, and as he quoted it) and that this is but the struggling of the flesh agt the spirit, wch cannot be conquered by yeelding but by fighting, and god wil own in and crown the soul after the combate &c

But tho she was sensible of her inward backwardnes, yet that good old man took notice of her outward forwardnes in dutys of religion, and he used to say, Alice, thou art mad, this wil not last long, the fire-edge will soon be taken off, thou art just like one that hath been long in prison, who when he is got out, cares not which way he runs so he get far and fast enough from his old prison, or like a man yt hath been long in darknes, and coming into light he admires at it, and lookes on himselfe as in a new world; just so art thou, looking upon thy condition as strange and uncouth but after a while we shal see thee more sober and solid lesse fiery and passionate, tho indeed she maintained a wel-tempered zeal al her days, however she might part with that froth and frolick that might be incident to youthful zeale. Yet that true spiritual force was not abated but increased in age she kept aliue that coale of zeale and maintained a

constant tenure of savour and fervour of spirit, suffering as few decays and eclipses as most doe of so long a profession: I haue often heard her say, that after the lord gaue her assurance she never lost it, but had some degrees therof, tho not always equal comfort or confidence, and tho this may be an arbitrary act of free grace, yet it may be the privilege of close-walkers,

for peace is upon them that walk according to the rule [gal 6 of the new creature:

The first time her wavering soule got any anchor or satisfaction after these tempestuous tossings was at and by meanes of a sermon preached upon that text, cant 2 16 my beloved is mine, and I am his, wch text her soule was exceedingly affected with, and desired it might be preacht upon at her funeral, or that in psal 42 5, why art thou cast downe-which also she took great pleasure in, for she used often to bespeak her own heart in the language of that text, and receiue comfort therby in al her soul-conflicts, and outward pressures, al her days: these too scriptures she injoyned my brother and me to preach upon, (for she ingaged us to preach togather at Cockey every year a day while she lived) and whiles we were preparing and purposing to preach on those subjects the lord removed her hence, yet we kept our promises and performed our resolutions, and shall doe whiles we liue if the lord grannt oppertunity and restore our libertys. this I can say, through gods mercy, yt having spent many serious thoughts upon both those texts, I haue seldome met with so much inlargement in preparation and delivering the matter I intended thereupon, as upon those subjects, both to my own satisfaction and (I hope) others edification :

But to returne to my relation, when the lord had thus betrothed and maryed my dear mother to himselfe in righteousnes, judgement loving-kindnes and mercys, he provided for her a suitable husband, my dear and honoured father, of whose piety and sincerity she had undoubted evidence, she hath often said that was the principal end of her choyce, and her heart was more endeared to him as an heir of the same grace of life, then for any other endowments: they were contracted first and then maryed (as I remember I haue heard them say) by good old Mr Horrocks, that famous light and precious instrument of god, to whom she had an endeared affection:

But no sooner was she linked in that relation and ingaged in the world, but behold a Gad, a troop, yea an army of troubles