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Bene. Good day, my lord.

D. Pedro. Welcome, signior: you are almost come to part almost a fray.

Claud. We had like to have had our two noses snapped off with two old men without teeth. D. Pedro. Leonato and his brother. What thinkest thou? Had we fought, I doubt we should have been too young for them. Bene. In a false quarrel there is no true valor. I came to seek you both.

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Claud. We have been up and down to seek thee; for we are high-proof melancholy and would fain have it beaten away. Wilt thou use thy wit? Bene. It is in my scabberd: shall I draw it? D. Pedro. Dost thou wear thy wit by thy side? Claud. Never any did so, though very many have been beside their wit. I will bid thee draw, as we do the minstrels; draw, to pleasure us. D. Pedro. As I am an honest man, he looks pale. Art thou sick, or angry?! ? 131 Claud. What, courage, man! What though care killed a cat, thou hast mettle enough in thee to kill care.

Bene. Sir, I shall meet your wit in the career, an you charge it against me. I pray you choose another subject.

Claud. Nay, then, give him another staff: this last was broke cross.

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D. Pedro. By this light, he changes more and more: I think he be angry indeed. Claud. If he be, he knows how to turn his girdle.

Bene. Shall I speak a word in your ear? Claud. God bless me from a challenge! Bene. [Aside to Claudio] You are a villain; I jest not: I will make it good how you dare, with what you dare, and when you dare. Do me right, or I will protest your cowardice. You have killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on you. Let me hear from you. 151 Claud. Well, I will meet you, so I may have good cheer.

D. Pedro. What, a feast, a feast! Claud. I' faith, I thank him; he hath bid me to a calf's head and a capon; the which if I do not carve most curiously, say my knife's nought. Shall I not find a woodcock too?

Bene. Sir, your wit ambles well; it goes easily. D. Pedro. I'll tell thee how Beatrice praised thy wit the other day. I said, thou hadst a fine wit: True, said she, a fine little one.' 'No,' said I, 'a great wit: Right,' says she, 'a great gross one. 'Nay,' said I, a good wit:' Just,' said she, it hurts nobody.' 'Nay,' said I, 'the gentleman is wise:' 'Certain,' said she, 'a wise gentleman. Nay,' said I, he hath the tongues:' "That I believe,' said she, 'for he swore a thing to me on Monday night, which he forswore on Tuesday morning; there's a double tongue; there's two tongues.' Thus did she, an honr together, trans-shape thy particular virtues: yet at last she concluded with a sigh, thou wast the properest man in Italy.

Claud. For the which she wept heartily and said she cared not.

D. Pedro. Yea, that she did; but yet, for all that, an if she did not hate him deadly, she would love him dearly: the old man's daughter told us all. 180

Claud. All, all: and, moreover, God saw him when he was hid in the garden.

D. Pedro. But when shall we set the savage bull's horns on the sensible Benedick's head? Claud. Yea, and text underneath, 'Here dwells Benedick the married man?'

My

Bene. Fare you well, boy: you know my mind. I will leave you now to your gossip-like humor: you break jests as braggarts do their blades, which, God be thanked, hurt not. lord, for your many courtesies I thank you: 1 must discontinue your company: your brother the bastard is fled from Messina: you have among you killed a sweet and innocent lady. For my Lord Lackbeard there, he and I shall meet: and, till then peace be with him. [Exit. D. Pedro. He is in earnest.

Claud. In most profound earnest; and, 'Il warrant you, for the love of Beatrice.

D. Pedro. And hath challenged thee. 200 Claud. Most sincerely.

D. Pedro. What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his doublet and hose and leaves off his wit!

Claud. He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape a doctor to such a man.

D. Pedro. But, soft you, let me be: pluck up, my heart, and be sad. Did he not say, my brother was fled?

Enter DOGBERRY, VERGES, and the Watch, with CONRADE and BORACHIO.

Dog. Come you, sir: if justice cannot tame you, she shall ne'er weigh more reasons in her balance: nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you must be looked to.

D. Pedro. How now? two of my brother's men bound! Borachio one!

Claud. Hearken after their offence, my lord. D. Pedro. Officers, what offence have these men done?

Dog. Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly, they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things; and, to conclude, they are lying knaves.

D. Pedro. First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I ask thee what's their offence; sixth and lastly, why they are committed; and, to conclude, what you lay to their charge.

Claud. Rightly reasoned, and in his own division; and, by my troth, there's one meaning well suited.

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D. Pedro. Who have you offended, masters, that you are thus bound to your answer? this learned constable is too cunning to be understood; what's your offence?

Bora. Sweet prince, let me go no further to mine answer; do you hear me, and let this count kill me. I have deceived even your very eyes: what your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have brought to light: who in the night overheard me confessing to this man how Don John your brother incensed me to slander the Lady Hero, how you were brought into the orchard and saw me court Margaret in Hero's garments, how you disgraced her, when you should marry her: my villany they have

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Leon. No, not so, villain; thou beliest thyself:
Here stand a pair of honorable men;
A third is fled, that had a hand in it.

I thank you, princes, for my daughter's death:
Record it with your high and worthy deeds:
'Twas bravely done, if you bethink you of it.
Claud. I know not how to pray your patience;
Yet I must speak. Choose your revenge yourself;
Impose me to what penance your invention
Can lay upon my sin: yet sinn'd I not
But in mistaking.

D. Pedro. By my soul, nor I:

And yet, to satisfy this good old man,

I would bend under any heavy weight

That he'll enjoin me to.

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Leon. I cannot bid you bid my daughter live; That were impossible: but, I pray you both, Possess the people in Messina here How innocent she died; and if your love Can labor aught in sad invention, Hang her an epitaph upon her tomb And sing it to her bones, sing it to-night: To-morrow morning come you to my house, And since you could not be my son-in-law, Be yet my nephew: my brother hath a daughter, Almost the copy of my child that's dead, And she alone is heir to both of us:

Give her the right you should have given her cousin,

And so dies my revenge.

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Your over-kindness doth wring tears from me!
I do embrace your offer: and dispose
For henceforth of poor Claudio.

Leon. To-morrow then I will expect your coming:

To-night I take my leave. This naughty man
Shall face to face be brought to Margaret,
Who I believe was pack'd in all this wrong,
Hired to it by your brother.

Bora.
No, by my soul, she was not,
Nor knew not what she did when she spoke to me,
But always hath been just and virtuous 311
In anything that I do know by her.

Dog. Moreover, sir, which indeed is not under white and black, this plaintiff here, the offender, did call me ass: I beseech you, let it be remembered in his punishment. And also, the watch heard them talk of one Deformed: they say he wears a key in his ear and a lock hanging by it, and borrows money in God's name, the which he hath used so long and never paid that now men grow hard-hearted and will lend nothing for God's sake: pray you, examine him upon that point. Leon. I thank thee for thy care and honest pains.

Dog. Your worship speaks like a most thankful and reverend youth; and I praise God for you. Leon. There's for thy pains.

Dog. God save the foundation!

Leon. Go, I discharge thee of thy prisoner, and I thank thee.

Dog. I leave an arrant knave with your worship; which I beseech your worship to correct yourself, for the example of others. God keep your worship! I wish your worship well; God restore you to health! I humbly give you leave to depart; and if a merry meeting may be wished, God prohibit it! Come, neighbor.

[Exeunt Dogberry and Verges. Leon. Until to-morrow morning, lords, farewell.

Ant. Farewell, my lords: we look for you

to-morrow.

D. Pedro. We will not fail.
Claud. To-night I'll mourn with Hero.
Leon. [To the Watch] Bring you these fel-
lows on. We'll talk with Margaret,

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How her acquaintance grew with this lewd fel low. [Exeunt, severally.

SCENE II. LEONATO's garden. Enter BENEDICK and MARGARET, meeting.

Bene. Pray thee, sweet Mistress Margaret, deserve well at my hands by helping me to the speech of Beatrice.

Marg, Will you then write me a sonnet in praise of my beauty?

Bene. In so high a style, Margaret, that no man living shall come over it; for, in most comely truth, thou deservest it.

Marg. To have no man come over me! why, shall I always keep below stairs?

10

Bene. Thy wit is as quick as the greyhound's mouth; it catches.

Marg. And yours as blunt as the fencer's foils, which hit, but hurt not.

Bene. A most manly wit, Margaret; it will

not hurt a woman: and so, I pray thee, call Beatrice I give thee the bucklers.

Marg. Give us the swords; we have bucklers of our own.

Bene. If you use them, Margaret, you must put in the pikes with a vice; and they are dangerous weapons for maids.

Marg. Well, I will call Beatrice to you, who I think hath legs.

Bene. And therefore will come.

[Sings] The god of love,

That sits above,

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shall live no longer in monument than the bell rings and the widow weeps.

Beat. And how long is that, think you? Bene. Question: why, an hour in clamor and aquarter in rheum: therefore is it most expedient for the wise, if Don Worm, his conscience, find no impediment to the contrary, to be the trumpet of his own virtues, as I am to myself. So much for praising myself, who, I myself will bear witness, is praiseworthy: and now tell me,

[Exit Margaret. how doth your cousin?
Beat. Very ill.

And knows me, and knows me,
How pitiful I deserve,-

I mean in singing; but in loving, Leander the
good swimmer, Troilus the first employer of
panders, and a whole bookful of these quondam
carpet-mongers, whose names yet run smoothly
in the even road of a blank verse, why, they were
never so truly turned over and over as my poor
self in love. Marry, I cannot show it in rhyme;
I have tried: I can find out no rhyme to 'lady'
but 'baby,' an innocent rhyme; for 'scorn,'
'horn,' a hard rhyme; for 'school,' 'fool,' a
babbling rhyme; very ominous endings: no, I
was not born under a rhyming planet, nor I
cannot woo in in festival terms.

Enter BEATRICE.

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Bene. And how do you?
Beat. Very ill too.

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Bene. Serve God, love me and mend. There will I leave you too, for here comes one in haste.

Enter URSULA.

Urs. Madam, you must come to your uncle. Yonder's old coil at home: it is proved my Lady Hero hath been falsely accused, the prince and Claudio mightily abused; and Don John is the author of all, who is fled and gone. Will you come presently?

Beat. Will you go hear this news, signior? Bene. I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap and be buried in thy eyes; and moreover I will go with thee to thy uncle's. [Exeunt.

SCENE III. A church.

Sweet Beatrice, wouldst thou come when I Enter DON PEDRO, CLAUDIO, and three or called thee?

[me.

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Beat. Foul words is but foul wind, and foul wind is but foul breath, and foul breath is noisome; therefore I will depart unkissed.

Bene. Thou hast frighted the word out of his right sense, so forcible is thy wit. But I must tell thee plainly, Claudio undergoes my challenge; and either I must shortly hear from him, or I will subscribe him a coward. And, I pray thee now, tell me for which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?

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Beat, Forthem all together; which maintained so politic a state of evil that they will not admit any good part to intermingle with them. But for which of my good parts did you first suffer love for me?

Bene. Suffer love! a good epithet! I do suffer love indeed, for I love thee against my will.

Beat. In spite of your heart, I think: alas, poor heart! If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for yours; for I will never love that which my friend hates.

[ably.

Bene. Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceBeat. It appears not in this confession: there's not one wise man among twenty that will praise himself.

Bene. An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that lived in the time of good neighbors. If a man do not erect in this age his own tomb ere he dies, he

four with tapers.

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Now, music, sound, and sing your solemn hymn.

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D. Pedro, Come, let us hence, and put on other weeds;

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And then to Leonato's we will go.
Claud. And Hymen now with luckier issue
speed's

Than this for whom we render'd up this woe.
[Exeunt.

SCENE IV. A room in LEONATO's house.
Enter LEONATO, ANTONIO, BENEDICK, BEA-
TRICE, MARGARET, URSULA, FRIAR FRANCIS,
and HERO.

Friar. Did not I tell you she was innocent?
Leon. So are the prince and Claudio, who
accused her

Upon the error that you heard debated:
But Margaret was in some fault for this,
Although against her will, as it appears
In the true course of all the question.

Ant. Well, I am glad that all things sort so
well.

Bene. And so am İ, being else by faith en

forced

To call young Claudio to a reckoning for it. Leon. Well, daughter, and you gentlewomen all,

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Withdraw into a chamber by yourselves,
And when I send for you, come hither mask'd.
[Exeunt Ladies.
The prince and Claudio promised by this hour
To visit me. You know your office, brother:
You must be father to your brother's daughter,
And give her to young Claudio.

Ant. Which I will do with confirm'd coun

tenance.

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Before this friar and swear to marry her.

Claud. Give me your hand: before this holy
friar,

I am your husband, if you like of me.
Hero. And when I lived, I was your other
wife:
[Unmasking. 60
And when you loved, you were my other hus-
Claud. Another Hero!
(band.
Hero.
Nothing certainer:

Bene. Friar, I must entreat your pains, I One Hero died defiled, but I do live,
think.

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Bene. Your answer, sir, is enigmatical:
But, for my will, my will is your good will
May stand with ours, this day to be conjoin'd
In the state of honorable marriage:

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Friar.

In which, good friar, I shall desire your help.
Leon. My heart is with your liking.
And my help.
Here comes the prince and Claudio.
Enter DON PEDRO and CLAUDIO, and two or
three others.

D. Pedro, Good morrow to this fair assembly.
Leon. Good morrow, prince; good morrow,
Claudio:

We here attend you Are you yet determined
To-day to marry with my brother's daughter?
Claud. I'll hold my mind, were she an Ethiope.
Leon. Call her forth, brother; here's the friar
ready.
[Exit Antonio.

And surely as I live, I am a maid.

D. Pedro. The former Hero! Hero that is dead!

Leon. She died, my lord, but whiles her
slander lived.

Friar. All this amazement can I qualify;
When after that the holy rites are ended,
I'll tell you largely of fair Hero's death:
Meantime let wonder seem familiar,
And to the chapel let us presently.

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Bene. Soft and fair, friar. Which is Beatrice?
Beat. [Unmasking] I answer to that name.
What is your will?

Bene. Do not you love me?

Beat.

Why, no; no more than reason.

Bene. Why, then your uncle and the prince
and Claudio

Have been deceived: they swore you did.
Beat. Do not you love me?

Bene. Troth, no; no more than reason.
Beat. Why, then my cousin Margaret and
Ursula

Are much deceived; for they did swear you did.
Bene. They swore that you were almost sick

for me.

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Beat. They swore that you were well-nigh dead for me.

Bene. 'Tis no such matter. Then you do not love me?

Beat. No, truly, but in friendly recompense. Leon. Come, cousin, I am sure you love the gentleman.

Claud. And I'll be sworn upon't that he loves her;

For here's a paper written in his hand,
A halting sonnet of his own pure brain,
Fashion'd to Beatrice.

Hero.

[et,

And here's another, Writ in my cousin's hand, stolen from her pockContaining her affection unto Benedick. 90 Bene. A miracle! here's our own hands against our hearts. Come, I will have thee; but, by this light, I take thee for pity.

Beat. I would not deny you; but, by this good day, I yield upon great persuasion; and partly to save your life, for I was told you were in a consumption.

Bene. Peace! I will stop your mouth. Kissing her. D. Pedro. How dost thou, Benedick, the married man?

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Bene. I'll tell thee what, prince; a college of wit-crackers cannot flout me out of my humor. Dost thou think I care for a satire or an epigram? No; if a man will be beaten with brains, a' shall wear nothing handsome about him. In brief, since I do purpose to marry, I will think nothing to any purpose that the world can say against it; and therefore never flout at me for what I

have said against it: for man is a giddy thing, and this is my conclusion. For thy part, Claudio, I did think to have beaten thee; but in that thou art like to be my kinsman, live unbruised and love my cousin.

Claud. I had well hoped thou wouldst have denied Beatrice, that I might have cudgelled thee out of thy single life, to make thee a double-dealer: which, out of question, thou wilt be, if my cousin do not look exceeding narrowly to thee.

Bene. Come, come, we are friends: let's have a dance ere we are married, that we may lighten

our own hearts and our wives' heels.

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Leon. We'll have dancing afterward. Bene. First, of my word; therefore play. music. Prince, thou art sad; get thee a wife, get thee a wife: there is no staff more reverend than one tipped with horn.

Enter a Messenger.

Mess. My lord, your brother John is ta'en in flight,

And brought with armed men back to Messina. Bene. Think not on him till to-morrow: I'll devise thee brave punishments for him. Strike up, pipers. Dance. 131 [Exeunt.

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