crative Art of Delufion, and every thing is taken for Sterling that but goes through your Hands. You can make Profanefs pafs for Wit, and Obfcenity for polite Converfation; Scolding for Rallery, and Hectoring for Courage, a Fool's Coat for pure Humour, and a Tweak by the Nofe, or a Box o'the Ear for keen Repartee. The prefent Sett of Criticks who prefide in the Theatres, and call themselves the Town, are Gentlemen, you well know, of fuch curious Conftitutions, as can by no Means undergo the Drudgery of Thinking; To their Tafte therefore do you prudently project to reduce your Productions. To apply to their Judgement you cannot, for you are convinc'd they have none; and to accoft their Senfes in a natural Way, would be likewife Impolitick, for those being a Sort of Inlets, or Sink-holes to the Underftanding, (which in thefe Gentlemen I look on to be a kind of Common Sewer) it would be only difturbing the Puddle, to befpatter your felf. Well-judg'd therefore is it of you, Sir, to endeavour to engage 'em by fuch Diversions, as were never before seen, heard, or conceiv'd; and never can be jug'd of or understood. In which Attempt you have fo wonderfully and meritorioufly fucceeded, that whilft the Sublime of a ShakeSpear, the Tenderness of an Otway, and the Humour of a Vanbrugh, are reprefented to empty Benches; you can by the fingle wave of a Harlequin's Wand, conjure the whole Town every Night into your Circle; where, like a true Cunning Man, you amufe 'em with a few Puppy's Tricks while you juggle 'em of their Pelf, and then cry out with a Note of Triumph,

Si Mundus vult Decipi,, Decipiatur.

And now, Sir, having given you a full and true count of your felf, we come next to say something

of

of our felves, with a Word upon our Performance. As to the following Piece, it is a Syftem of the Laws of Modern Poetry eftablish'd amongst us by the Authority of the moit Successful Writers of the prefent Age, by which it appears that the Rules now follow'd, are in all Refpects exactly the Reverse of those which were observ'd by the Authors of Antiquity, and which were fet forth of old by Horace in his Epiftle de Arte Poetica. In a word, Sir, it is Horace turn'd Harlequin, with his Head where his Heels fhould be; in which Pofture we ween not but he will be well receiv'd by your Worship, and in Confequence of that, by the whole Town.

Nec Phabo gratior ulla eft

Quam fibi qua Vari prefcripfit pagina Nomen.

But here fue we for Pardon, in not having confider'd that you are too much both of a modern fine Gentleman, and Poet, to understand Quotations from fuch antiquated Authors. Howbeit we are warranted hereunto by the daily Practice of our Brethren, who never fail to interlace, and trim their Prefaces with Scraps from Authors at once so very foreign and enigmatical, that neither their Patrons or themselves are travel'd enough to unriddle them.

And now for the Criticks, thofe malevolent Mungrils, whofe Barking we defpife; Thofe Blund'ring Oxen, who tread down the good Corn, only to come at the Weeds; Thofe Black Birds, who will be always pick

*This Treatment of the Criticks is correfpondent with the Practice of our Modern Writers, who never fail to fall foul on them at the very Threshold of their Works, providently purpofing, to obviate thereby, any undue Influence which their future Cavils and Animadverfions might have on the candid Reader.

L

ing Holes in the faireft Fruit; Thofe Ruffians, with dark Lanthorns, which contain juft Light enough to fhew 'em the Way to murder other People; thofe Rats, which tear Books to Pieces, only to come at the Pafte they are glew'd with; Thofe Owls, Batts, Vultures, Drones, Bears, Tigers, Crocodiles, Dragons, we dread, abominate, neglect, and contemn; being thoroughly fatisfy'd with our felves, and this our Performance; well knowing that what we have done, will be of infinite Service to Mankind in general, and greatly tend to the Advantage of our own dear Countrymen, and Brethren; The comfortable Reflection upon which, and the Approbation we shall unquestionably receive from the Town (and for which we lay hold of this Opportunity to return them our humble and hearty Thanks) will fupport us under all the Oppofition we may meet with from the above-mention'd Hottentots; and will encourage us to go on to the utmost of our Power, and publish something more as speedily as poffible.

One Word more Sir, and we bid you adieu; we had once purpos'd to make the following Work more acceptable to the Erudite, by cafting at the Foot of each Page, a Competency of Notes both Critical and Explanatory; but upon more mature Deliberation, we determin'd to leave this Part to the penetrating, nice-gueffing, and laborious Dr. Zoiluss no way doubting but he will execute it with equal Aftonifhment and Satisfaction to the gentle Reader, as he has already done with regard to the original Author.

In this Edition indeed (finding that the other great Critick has been too much engag'd in his immortal Labours on Paradife Loft to comply with our Request) we have thought meet to fcatter here and there a few

*Vide B-ley's Edition of Horace.

Animad

Animadverfions by way of Illuftration, which have been communicated to us by Bavius, Mævius and other of our Grubean Elders.

And now, Sir, begging Pardon both of your felf and the Publick, for taking up fo much of your precious Time, which is always employ'd in their Service, we conclude with our fincere and difinterested wishes, that Mercury and Venus may take you into their Protection; and that you may never grow fat, or be laid by the Heels, but may ever Remain flender, flippant and free, both for the Recreation of this Metropolis, and your own private Emolument.

་་་་

Harlequin- Horace :

OR, THE

ART of Modern POETRY.

(1)

F fome great Artist in whofe Works confpire

The Grace of Raphael, and a Titian's Fire,

Should toil to draw the Portrait of a Fair

With Shaftsb'ry's Mien, and Harvey's pleasing Air;

A Shape that might with lovely Queenb'rough's vie, 5 The Smile of Vanbrugh, and a Hertford's Eye,

B

41) Humano capiti cervicem Pictor Equinam Jungere fi Velit, & varias inducere plumas, Undique collatis membris, ut turpiter atrum

Thy

VER. 4. With Shaftsry's Mien.] Whatever may be objected to this Performance in general, we trust the most inveterate of our Gainjayers will allow, that there are incomparable Beauties in the eight following Lines of it.