Wi' arm reposed on the chair back,
He sweetly does compose him!

Which, by degrees, slips round her neck,
An''s loof' upon her bosom,

Unkenn'd that day.

Now a' the congregation o'er
Is silent expectation;
For ***** speels' the holy door,
Wi' tidings o' damnation.3
Should Hornie, as in ancient days,
'Mang sons o' God present him,
The very sight o' *****'s face,
To's ain het hame had sent him
Wi' fright that day.

Hear how he clears the points o' faith
Wi' rattlin' an' wi' thumpin'!
Now meekly calm, now wild in wrath,
He's stampin' an' he's jumpin'!
His lengthen'd chin, his turn'd-up snout,
His eldritch squeel' and gestures,
Oh how they fire the heart devout,
Like cantharidian plasters,

On sic a day!

But, hark! the tent has changed its voice;
There's peace an' rest nae langer;

For a' the real judges rise,

They canna sit for anger!

***** opens out his cauld harangues,
On practice and on morals;
An' aff the godly pour in thrangs,
To gie the jars an' barrels

A lift that day.

What signifies his barren shine

Of moral powers and reasons
His English style an' gestures fine

Are a' clean out o' season.

1 Palm of the hand.-2 To climb.

3 This word was originally printed salvation. The present reading wa Adopted in the Edinburgh edition, at the suggestion of Dr. Blair, by which the wit of the verse is undoubtedly improved.

4 Hot home. 5 Frightful scream.-6 A field pulpit.

Like Socrates or Antonine,
Or some auld pagan heathen,
The moral man he does define,
But ne'er a word o' faith in

That's right that day.

In guid time comes an antidote
Against sic poison'd nostrum;
For *******, frae the water-fit,'
Ascends the holy rostrum:
See, up he's got the word o' God,
An' meek an' mim' has view'd it,
While Common Sense has taen the road,
An' aff an' up the Cowgate,

3

Fast, fast, that day.

Wee ****** niest the guard relieves,

An' Orthodoxy raibles,

5

Tho' in his heart he weel believes,
An' thinks it auld wives' fables:
But, faith! the birkie wants a manse,'
So, cannily he hums them;

Altho' his carnal wit and sense

Like hafflins-ways o'ercomes him
At times that day.

Now, butt an' ben' the change-house1o fills,
Wi' yill-caup" commentators:

Here's crying out for bakes and gills,
An' there the pint stowp" clatters;
While thick an' thrang, an' loud an' lang,
Wi' logic and wi' Scripture,

They raise a din, that in the end,

Is like to breed a rupture

O' wrath that day.

Leeze me13 on drink! it gies us mair
Than either school or college:
It kindles wit, it waukens lear,"

14

It pangs us fou1 o' knowledge.

1 Water-foot.-2 Prim.-3 A street so called.-4 Next.-5 To rattle noncense. A clever fellow. The parsonage-house where the minister lives. - Partly, nearly half.-9 Kitchen and parlor.-10 Country inn, or ale-house -11 Ale-cup.-12 Pint-pot.-13 A phrase of endearment.-14 Learning..5 Crams us full.

Be 't whisky gill' or penny wheep,'
Or onie stronger potion,
It never fails, on drinking deep,
To kittle3 up our notion

By night or day.

The lads an' lasses blythely bent
To mind baith saul an' body,
Sit round the table weel content,
An' steer about the toddy.

On this ane's dress, an' that ane's leuk,'
They're making observations;
While some are cozie i' the neuk,"
An' forming assignations,

To meet some day.

But now the Lord's ain trumpet touts,
Till a' the hills are rairin',"

An' echoes back return the shouts :
Black ****** is nae spearin':

His piercing words, like Highland swords,
Divide the joints an' marrow;

His talk o' hell, where devils dwell,
Our vera sauls does harrow

Wi' fright that day.

A vast, unbottom'd, boundless pit,
Fill'd fou o' lowin' brunstane,9
Whase raging flame an' scorchin' heat,
Wad melt the hardest whunstane !10
The half-asleep start up wi' fear,
An' think they hear it roarin',
When presently it does appear
'T was but some neebor snorin'
Asleep that day.

'T wad be owre lang a tale to tell
How monie stories past,

An' how they crowded to the yill,"
When they were a' dismist:

1 A gill of whisky.-2 Small beer.-3 Tickle.-4 Look, appearance.-" Snug In the corner. The blast of a trumpet.-7 Roaring.-8 Shakspeare's Hamlet. - Flaming brimstone.-10 The hard rock found in the Ayrshire quarrice.1 Ale.

How drink gaed round in cogs an' caups,
Amang the furms an' benches;

An' cheese an' bread, frae women's laps,
Were dealt about in lunches

An' dawds' that day.

In comes a gaucie,' gash' guidwife,
An' sits down by the fire,

Syne' draws her kebbuck' an' her knife:
The lasses they are shyer.
The auld guidmen, about the grace,
Frae side to side they bother,
Till some ane by his bonnet lays,
An' gies them 't like a tether,
Fu' lang that day.

Waesucks for him that gets nae lass,
Or lasses that hae naething!
Sma' need has he to say a grace,
Or melvie' his braw claithing!
O wives, be mindfu' ance yoursel
How bonnie lads ye wanted,
An' dinna, for a kebbuck-heel,
Let lasses be affronted

On sic a day!

8

10

Now Clinkumbell,' wi' rattlin' tow,1o

Begins to jow an' croon;"

Some swagger hame the best they dow,"
Some wait the afternoon.

At slaps the billies" halt a blink,"
Till lasses slip their shoon:

Wi' faith and hope, an' love an' drink,

They're a' in famous tune

For crack

that day.

How monie hearts this day converts

O' sinners and o' lasses!

Their hearts o' stane, gin night, are gane
As saft as onie flesh is.

1 Large pieces.-2 Jolly.-3 Sagacious.-4 Then.-5 Cheese.-6 Alas!-7 To soil with meal.-8 The heel of cheese.- Who rings the church bell.-10 Rope. -11 The motion of ringing, and sound of the bell.-12 As well as they can.13 Gates.-14 Young men.-15 A little time.-16 Talk.

There's some are fou1 o' love divine;
There's some are fou o' brandy;
An' monie jobs that day begin,
May end in houghmagandie''
Some ither day.

THE ORDINATION.

For sense they little owe to frugal Heaven-
To please the mob, they hide the little given.

KILMARNOCK Wabsters, fidge an' claw,*
An' pour your creshie nations;
An' ye wha leather rax an' draw,
Of a' denominations-

Swith to the Laigh Kirk, ane an' a',

An' there tak up your stations;
Then aff to Begbie's in a raw,"

An' pour divine libations

7

For joy this day.

Curst Common Sense, that imp o' hell,
Cam in wi' Maggie Lauder,
But O ****** aft made her yell,
An' Russel sair misca'd her;
This day M'Kinlay taks the flail,
An' he's the boy will blaud' her;
He'll clap a shangan" on her tail,
An' set the bairns" to daub her
Wi' dirt this day.

Mak haste an' turn king David owre,
An' lilt wi' holy clangor;
O' double verse come gie us four,
An' skirl13 up the Bangor:

1 Full.-2 Fornication.-3 Weavers.-4 Scrat.cn.- Greasy.-6 Stretch. An allusion to shoemakers.-7 Row.

8 Alluding to a scoffing ballad which was made on the admission of the late reverend and worthy Mr. L. to the Laigh Kirk.

To slap or strike.-10 A cleft stick, sometimes mischievously fastened to the tail of a dog.-11 Children.-12 To sing.-13 To shriek, or cry aloud.