Amicitia nisi inter bonos esse non potest."-CICERO.
WHAT virtue can we name, or grace, But men unqualified and base Will boast it their possession? Profusion apes the noble part Of liberality of heart,
And dulness, of discretion. But as the gem of richest cost Is ever counterfeited most, So, always, imitation Employs the utmost skill she can To counterfeit the faithful man, The friend of long duration.
Some will pronounce me too severe, But long experience speaks me clear; Therefore that censure scorning, I will proceed to mark the shelves On which so many dash themselves, And give the simple warning. Youth, unadmonish'd by a guide, Will trust to any fair outside,- An error soon corrected; For who but learns with riper years, That man, when smoothest he appears, Is most to be suspected?
But here again a danger lies, Lest, thus deluded by our eyes,
And taking trash for treasure, We should, when undeceived, conclude Friendship imaginary good,
A mere Utopian pleasure. An acquisition rather rare Is yet no subject of despair;
Nor should it seem distressful,
If either on forbidden ground, Or where it was not to be found, We sought it unsuccessful. No friendship will abide the test, That stands on sordid interest And mean self-love erected; Nor such as may awhile subsist 'Twixt sensualist and sensualist, For vicious ends connected.
Who hopes a friend, should have a heart Himself well furnish'd for the part, And ready on occasion
To show the virtue that he seeks; For 't is a union that bespeaks A just reciprocation.
A fretful temper will divide The closest knot that may be tied, By ceaseless sharp corrosion : A temper passionate and fierce May suddenly your joys disperse At one immense explosion. In vain the talkative unite With hope of permanent delight; The secret just committed They drop through mere desire to prate, Forgetting its important weight,
And by themselves outwitted.
How bright soe'er the prospect seems, All thoughts of friendship are but dreams, If envy chance to creep in; An envious man, if you succeed, May prove a dangerous foe indeed, But not a friend worth keeping.
As envy pines at good possess'd, So jealousy looks forth distress'd, On good that seems approaching, And if success his steps attend, Discerns a rival in a friend,
And hates him for encroaching.
Hence authors of illustrious name, (Unless belied by common fame,) Are sadly prone to quarrel; To deem the wit a friend displays So much of loss to their own praise, And pluck each other's laurel. A man renown'd for repartee Will seldom scruple to make free With friendship's finest feeling; Will thrust a dagger at your breast, And tell you 't was a special jest, By way of balm for healing. Beware of tattlers; keep your ear Close stopt against the tales they hear,- Fruits of their own invention;
The separation of chief friends Is what their kindness most intends; Their sport is your dissension. Friendship that wantonly admits A joco-serious play of wits In brilliant altercation, Is union such as indicates, Like hand-in-hand insurance plates, Danger of conflagration.
Some fickle creatures boast a soul True as the needle to the pole; Yet shifting, like the weather, The needle's constancy forego For any novelty, and show Its variations rather. Insensibility makes some Unseasonably deaf and dumb,
When most you need their pity; 'Tis waiting till the tears shall fall From Gog and Magog in Guildhall,- Those playthings of the City. The great and small but rarely meet On terms of amity complete:
The attempt would scarce be madder,
Should any, from the bottom, hope At one huge stride to reach the top Of an erected ladder.
Courtier and patriot cannot mix Their heterogeneous politics Without an effervescence, Such as of salts with lemon-juice; But which is rarely known to induce, Like that, a coalescence. Religion should extinguish strife, And make a calm of human life: But even those who differ Only on topics left at large,
How fiercely will they meet and charge! No combatants are stiffer.
To prove, alas! my main intent, Needs no great cost of argument, No cutting and contriving; Seeking a real friend, we seem To adopt the chymist's golden dream With still less hope of thriving.
Then judge, or e'er you choose your man, As circumspectly as you can,
And, having made election, See that no disrespect of yours, Such as a friend but ill endures, Enfeeble his affection.
It is not timber, lead and stone, An architect requires alone, To finish a great building; The palace were but half complete, Could he by any chance forget The carving and the gilding.
As similarity of mind,
Or something not to be defined, First rivets our attention; So, manners, decent and polite, The same we practised at first sight, Must save it from declension.
The man who hails you Tom or Jack, And proves by thumping on your back, His sense of your great merit, Is such a friend, that one had need Be very much his friend indeed, To pardon or to bear it.
Some friends make this their prudent plan- Say little, and hear all you can ;" Safe policy, but hateful:
So barren sands imbibe the shower, But render neither fruit nor flower, Unpleasant and ungrateful.
They whisper trivial things, and small; But, to communicate at all
Things serious, deem improper; Their feculence and froth they show, But keep the best contents below, Just like a simmering copper. These samples (for alas! at last These are but samples, and a taste Of evils yet unmention'd ;) May prove the task, a task indeed, In which 't is much, if we succeed, However well-intention'd.
Pursue the theme, and you shall find A disciplined and furnish'd mind To be at least expedient, And, after summing all the rest, Religion ruling in the breast
A principal ingredient.
True friendship has, in short, a grace More than terrestrial in its face,
That proves it heaven-descended; Man's love of woman not so pure, Nor, when sincerest, so secure To last till life is ended.
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