In thy opinion, which is worthiest love? According to my shallow simple skill. Pro. It shall go hard, but I'll prove it by another. Speed. Such another proof will make me cry baa. Speed. Ay, sir: I, a lost mutton, gave your letter to her, a laced mutton; and she, a laced mutton, gave me, a lost mutton, nothing for my labour. Pro. Here's too small a pasture for such a store of muttons. Speed. If the ground be overcharged, you were best stick her. Pro. Nay, in that you are astray; 'twere best pound you. Speed. Nay, sir, less than a pound shall serve me for Pro. You mistake; I mean the pound, a pinfold. Pro. But what said she? did she nod? Pro. Nod, I? why, that's noddy. But, were I you, he never should be mine. Should censure thus on lovely gentlemen. Jul. Your reason? Luc. I have no other but a woman's reason; Speed. You mistook, sir; I say, she did nod: and you Luc. Peruse this paper, madam! ask me, if she did nod: and I say, I. Speed. Now you have taken the pains to set it together, take it for your pains! Pro. No, no, you shall have it for bearing the letter. Speed. Open your purse, that the money, and the Pro. Well, sir, here is for your pains! What said she? Speed. No, not so much as-take this for thy pains! SCENE II. The same. Garden of Julia's house. Jul. But say, Lucetta, now we are alone, Luc. Ay, madam, so you stumble not unheedfully. That every day with parle encounter me, Jul. To Julia, Say, from whom? Luc. Sir Valentine's page; and sent, I think, from Proteus: He would have given it you, but I, being in the way, [Exit. Luc. That you may ruminate. Re-enter LUCETTA. Luc. I would it were; That you might kill your stomach on your meat, Jul. What is't you took up So gingerly? Luc. Nothing. Luc. Korg Mãe there stil, so you will sing it out: And yet, mesninas, I do not like this tone. Jul. You do not? Luc. No, madam, it is too sharp Jul. You, mision, are too sancy. And mar the concord with too harsh a descant: To be so anger'd with another letter. [Exit. Jul. Nay, would I were so anger'd with the same! O hateful hands, to tear such loving words! Injurious wasps, to feed on such sweet honey, And kill the bees, that yield it, with your stings! fil kiss each several paper for amends. And here is writ-kind Julia; - unkind Julia! I throw thy name against the bruising stones, Shall lodge thee, will thy wound be throughly heal'd; He couples it to his complaining names; Luc. Madam, dinner's ready, and your father stays. He salt, that Proteas, wear co, was meet; To let him spend his time no more at home, Which would be great impeachment to his age, Luc. What, shall these papers lie like telltales here? [Exeunt. In having known no travel in his youth. Ant. Nor used'st thou much importane me to that, Whereon this month I have been hammering. I have considered well his loss of time, And perfected by the swift course of time: Pant. Twere good, I think, your lordship sent him thither: There shall he practise tilts and tournaments, Worthy his youth and nobleness of birth. I will dispatch him to the emperor's court. Ant. Good company! with them shall Proteus go: And, in good time, now will we break with him. Enter PROTEUS Pro. Sweet love! sweet lines! sweet life! Ant. How now? what letter are you reading there? What maintenance he from his friends receives, Like exhibition thou shalt have from me. To-morrow be in readiness to go: Excuse it not, for I am peremptory. Pro. My lord, I cannot be so soon provided; Please you, deliberate a day or two! Val. But tell me, dost thou know my lady Silvia? Val. Dost thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet knowest her not? Ant. Look, what thou want'st, shall be sent after Speed. Is she not hard-favoured, sir? thee. No more of stay! to-morrow thou must go. To hasten on his expedition. [Exeunt Ant. and Pant. Re-enter PANTHINO. o! Pant. Sir Proteus, your father calls for you; He is in haste; therefore, I pray you, go Pro. Why this it is! my heart accords thereto; And yet a thousand times it answers no. [Exeunt. Val. Why, sir, who bade you call her? Speed. Your worship, sir; or else I mistook. Val. Well, you'll still be too forward. Speed. And yet I was last chidden for being too slow. Val. Go to, sir; tell me, do you know madam Silvia? Speed. She that your worship loves? Val. Why, how know you that I am in love? Speed. Marry, by these special marks: First, you have learned, like sir Proteus, to wreath your arms like a male- content; to relish a lovesong, like a Robin-redbreast; to walk alone, like one that hath the pestilence; to sigh, like a school-boy that had lost his A, B, C; to weep, like a young wench that had buried her grandam; to fast, like one that takes diet; to watch, like one that fears robbing; to speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were wont, when you laughed, to crow like a cock; when you walked, to walk like one of the lions; when you fasted, it was presently after dinner; when you looked sadly, it was for want of money; and now you are metamorphos'd with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master. Val. Are all these things perceived in me? Speed. They are all perceived without you. Val. Without me? they cannot. Speed. Without you; nay, that's certain, for, without you were so simple, none else would; but you are so without these follies, that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an urinal; that not an eye, that sees you, but is a physician to comment on your malady. Val. Not so fair, boy, as well favoured. Speed. That she is not so fair, as (of you) well favoured. Val. I mean, that her beauty is exquisite, but her favour infinite. Speed. That's because the one is painted, and the other out of all count. Val. How painted? and how out of count? Speed. Marry, sir, so painted to make her fair, that no man counts of her beauty. Val. How esteemest thou me? I account of her beauty. Speed. You never saw her since she was deformed. Val. How long hath she been deformed? Speed. Ever since you lov'd her. Val. I have lov'd her ever since I saw her; and still I see her beautiful. Speed. If you love her, you cannot see her. Speed. Because love is blind. O, that you had mine eyes:or your own had the lights they were wont to have, when you chid at sir Proteus, for going ungartered! J'al. What should I see then? Speed. Your own present folly, and her passing deformity: for he, being in love, could not see to garter his hose; and you, being in love, cannot see to put on your hose. Val. Belike, boy, then you are in love; for last morning you could not see to wipe my shoes. Speed. True, sir, I was in love with my bed: I thank you, you swinged me for my love, which makes me the bolder to chide for you yours. Val. In conclusion, I stand affected to her. cease. Val. Last night she enjoined me to write some lines to one she loves. Speed. And have you? Speed. Are they not lamely writ? Val. No, boy, but as well as I can do them :- Peace, here she comes. Enter SILVIA. Speed. O excellent motion! O exceeding puppet! now will he interpret to her. [Aside. Val. Madam and mistress, a thousandgood-morrows. Speed. O, 'give you good even! here's a million of manners. [Aside. Sil. Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. Speed. He should give her interest; and she gives it him. [Aside. Val. As you enjoin'd me, I have writ your letter Unto the secret nameless friend of yours; Which I was much unwilling to proceed in, But for my duty to your ladyship. Sil. I thank you, gentle servant: 'tis very clerkly done. I writ at random, very doubtfully. And yet take this again; - and yet I thank you; Speed. And yet you will; and yet another yet [Aside. Val. Madam, they are for you. Sil. Ay, ay; you writ them, sir, at my request; Val. Please you, I'll write your ladyship another. Sil. Why, if it please you, take it for your labour; As a nose ou a man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple! SCENEIII. The same. A street. Enter LAUNCE, leading a dog. Laun. Nay, 'twill be this hour ere I have done weepMy master sues to her; and she hath taught her suitor,ing; all the kind of the Launces have this very fault: He being her pupil, to become her tutor. I have received my proportion, like the prodigious son, and am going with Sir Proteus to the Imperial's court. I think, Crab my dog be the sourest-natured dog that lives: : my mother weeping, my father wailing, my sister crying, our maid howling, our cat wringing her hands, and all our house in a great perplexity, yet did not this cruel-hearted cur shed one tear: he is a stone, a very pebble-stone, and has no more pity in him than a dog: a Jew would have wept to have seen our parting; why, my grandam having no eyes, look you, wept herself blind at my parting. Nay, I'll show you the manner of it: This shoe is my father; no, the dog T and me, no, this left shoe is my father; no, no, this left shoe is mother;my nay, that cannot be so neither; it is it is so; - yes, so, it hath the worser sole: This shoe, with the hole in it, is my mother, and this my father; a vengeance on't! there 'tis: now, sir, this staff is my sister; for, look you, she is as white as a lily, and as small as a wand: this hat is Nan, our maid; I am the dog :is himself, and I am the dog : — 0, the dog is I am myself; ay, so, so. Now come I to my father; Father, your blessing! Now should not the shoe speak a word for weeping; now should I kiss my father; well, could speak now!) like a wood woman;· well, I kiss her; why, there 'tis ; here's my mother's breath up and down: now come I to my sister; mark the moan she makes: now, the dog all this while sheds not a tear, nor speaks a word; but see how I lay the dust with my tears. Enter PANTHING. Speed. And that letter hath she deliver'd, and there he weeps on :-now come I to my mother, (0, that she an end. Pant. Launce, away, away, aboard! thy master is shipped, and thou art to post after with oars. What's the matter? why weep'st thou, man? Away, ass! you will lose the tide, if you tarry any longer. Laun. It is no matter, if the ty'd were lost; for it is the unkindest ty'd, that ever any man ty❜d. Pant. What's the unkindest tide? Laun. Why, he that's ty'd here; Crab, my dog. Pant. Tut, man, I mean thou'lt lose the flood; and, in losing the flood, lose thy voyage; and, in losing thy voyage, lose thy master; and, in losing thy master, lose thy service; and, in losing thy service, - Why dost thou stop my mouth? Laun. For fear, thou should'st lose thy tongue. WI Laun. Sir, call me what thou darest. Pant Wilt thou go? Laun. Well, I will go. SCENE IV. - Milan. An apartment in the Duke's palace. Enter VALENTINE, SILVIA, THURIO, and SPEED. Sil. Servant Made use and fair advantage of his days; [Exeunt. His head unmellow'd, but his judgment ripe; Sil. What, angry, Sir Thurio? do you change colour? Val. Give him leave, madam; he is a kind of cameleon. Thu. That hath more mind to feed on your blood, than live in your air. Val. You have said, sir. Thu. Ay, sir, and done too, for this time. Val. I know it well, sir; you always end ere you begin. Val. 'Tis indeed, madam; we thank the giver. Val. Yourself, sweet lady; for you gave the fire: Sir Val. I know it well, sir: you have an exchequer of words, and, I think, no other treasure to give your followers; for it appears by their bare liveries, that they live by your bare words. Sil. No more, gentlemen, no more! here comes my father. Enter DUKE. Duke. Now, daughter Silvia, you are hard beset. Val. My lord, I will be thankful To any happy messenger from thence. Duke. Know you Don Antonio, your countryman? Fal. Ay, my good lord; a son, that well deserves Val. I knew him, as myself; for from our infancy To clothe mine age with angel-like perfection: And here he means to spend his time a-while: I think, 'tis no unwelcome news to you. Val. Should I have wish'd a thing, it had been he. Duke. Welcome him then according to his worth! Silvia, I speak to you, and you, sir Thurio : For Valentine, I need not 'cite him to it: I'll send him hither to you presently. [Exit Duke. Val. This is the gentleman, I told your ladyship, Had come along with me, but that his mistress Did hold his eyes lock'd in her crystal looks. Sil. Belike, that now she hath enfranchis'd them Upon some other pawn for fealty. Val. Nay, sure, I think, she holds them prisoners still. Sil. Nay, then he should be blind; and, being blind, How conld he see his way to seek out you? Val. Why, lady, love hath twenty pair of eyes. Sil. Have done, have done! here comes the gentle man. Val. Welcome, dear Proteus !— Mistress, I beseech you, Confirm his welcome with some special favour! Pro. No; that you are worthless. Serv. Madam, my lord your father would speak with you. Sil. I'll wait upon his pleasure. [Exit Servant. Come, sir Thurio, Go with me! Once more, new servant, welcome! I'll leave you to confer of home affairs; When you have done, we look to hear from you. [Exeunt Silvia, Thurio, and Speed. Val. Now, tell me, how do all from whence you came? Pro. Your friends are well, and have them much commended. Val. And how do yours? Pro. I left them all in health. Val. How does your lady? and how thrives your love? Pro. My tales of love were wont to weary you; know, you joy not in a love-discourse. |